1987-12-03-Individual Good Qualities
Topic: Individual Good Qualities
Group: New Zealand TeaM
Martinus says opening prayer.
Teacher: I am Abraham, I am your Teacher
All Good evening Abraham
Teacher: Greetings. Then, you have homework?
Tm Yes I am Tommas I have never really been much of a one for labelling my self, and I thought about it in the past week and I think the only description. I've come up with is, I seem to have become a Leader, both at work and play and hobbies...
"I seem to get people come to me for advice on different subjects and thinking about it it's been over quite a few years really I guess. I've always tended to shy away from responsibility, I've never wanted to be the one up front, but things seem to have changed around to that way, even in my club activities as well, here I really only wanted to be just a member, instead of President.
"Yes, I guess so.
Mrt I am Martinus. I think you said in our earlier teachings that I was given the name of Comforter, which I believe to be so, because I have always been a good listener, and people seem to be able to sometimes talk out their troubles which eases them and makes there feel better, so I think I can go along with that name and understand it.
"Even when I am not.
Yes. You give reason, Selina
"Well only that, if anybody ever asked me to do anything they know they only have to ask me the once, and I will do it. I will do it as soon as I am able, and I will do it well as I am able. They can rely on me like a member of the family, a friend, a relation, or employer. They just tell me that they want, or what they need, or what they would like, and just leave it to me, any: they know if I can somehow manage the favour, do the job, whatever it is, I'll do it to the best of my ability. I will give them what it is they are asking for if I can possibly manage it.
Dm I too had trouble with my word at the beginning of the week. I just wanted to say the correct word was "ME" Dominica, later on l moved onto words like caring again and ended up with strong & strength but I still don't really know, I haven’t really decided.
"More like emotional strength.
Teacher: I would differ, emotional strength you do not yet have, physical, yes. But as I have said, for one of your years, you are still testing, yes.
Ben I am Benjamin, and I remember when you used a word for what we were, you said I was a pillar. I remember at the time not feeling that way at all, but I think I have come along that pathway some of the way, and I feel a lot more comfortable about myself and therefore much more stronger in my awareness of self than before, so I feel I have come some way in meeting that word.
Bry I am . Bryoni. When I first thought about this when I went home last week. The first word that came to mind, was Alone, and I thought that doesn’t really meet a description, and I had proof over the week that nobody is entirely alone, but I don't really know exactly about a description, thoughtful perhaps.
Teacher: Then you may continue to discover this.
Bld I am Belinda, when I was thinking of a word to describe myself I couldn’t think of anything that stood out as a physical description, and what came to mind was a word: to describe the inner me, and I came up with. I am Aware, I thought of my awareness to my consciousness,how my soul consciousness is growing and the changes in me.
Teacher: Then you should also be aware you are a pacifist yes. Never forgetting there is need for the leader to be lead. The Comforter to be comforted. The effervescent to be enlivened. The dependable to depend on others. The one who is testing, to be tested... The pillar, to also lean on others. The one who is looking, to be looked to. And the pacifist to be pacified. You have each found for yourself a description a part, it has been an exercise for you to look into your self, and to see your self with your own eyes. Yes. You wish to comment.
Teacher: You perhaps search too hard.
"I kept thinking this during the week, I'm looking too hard and I‘ll just leave it, then later or in the day I think I still haven’t come up with a word and I'd have another little think. Then an hour ago discussing amongst the family before the people arrived, I still wasn’t sure. Then just the word Leader came to me, and I thought that's a pretty good description of my life.
Tms I've not wanted it, but I seem to be coping
Sln Well I like being dependable. I like being able to have others rely on me and feel that I can fulfil what it is they want me to do. Tommas has often said to me that I am too soft with people, that they "put" on me. That they know whatever they ask of me, I will do it if I can. And I know that, but I really don't mind, I'm quite happy to do the chore anyway. I'm thinking of instances even years ago, when I had a friend that used to ask me to baby sit an awful lot, but she was sometimes not there for me when I needed a favour back, and Tommas said to me many times, stop being so soft, stop always being there for them, and they will appreciate you more, and I just felt if some body comes to me for something, I just couldn’t turn them away, that would just be being a bitch or spiteful, just to do it, for that sake.
Cl I had the same thing happen, but I was in a group & said do you enjoy looking after a child. I couldn’t ask back, that was my problem. I could give, but I couldn’t ask back, and they said, you are the most selfish person, because you are giving, you are helping somebody but you wouldn’t ask them to do the same for you. You are not allowing them to have the good feeling. Slight difference.
SIn Yes slightly different, because when I did ask, friends just haven’t been there for me. But one of the words I nearly came up with tonight, I was tossing up between dependable & independent, and I looked up independent in the dictionary, and I then thought well, only part of that whole answer fits me, perhaps that word doesn’t fit me as good as dependable does, but I am independent up to a point where I hate asking for favours now, because I don't want to be hurt by being turned down, I suppose that's pride coming into it again, but I try to go it alone, as a family we try to go it alone where possible & not lean on others too much.
Cl Again the same thing applies. If you ask & they say no, that's fine. Don't take it as an offence against you, they are busy, and you have the right to be busy too, and you have the right to say yes or no.
Sln Yes, I know. But we have usually only ever asked if we have been desperate, something that we cannot mange on our own, and to have asked in the first place, and then you are told...
You have only asked in the first place because you thought they would be free to help, or knew they could manage it, so now over the years, we try to be independent. This is friends or relations in the family that are never there for us but are always phoning you for favours
Tms Which I do, then you say to me, you always go to help, and they don't do anything back, but that is me, if they can't manage it, so I'll do it for them,
Sln Well there you are. So I'm saying to you, what you used to say to me years ago, so you have to stop saying it to me, because you are what you are.
Tms Except these people used to offer, in return I will do such and such for you, and they never did.
"No, but it was a situation where with young children, you couldn’t get out for an evening, they used to say could you look after our children, we will return the favour, which is fair, but they never return the favours. In the end we joined a circle where you worked on a points system, and that solved the problem,
Bry I am like you, I don't like asking my family. I won't ask them now, because I actually expect to be rejected, and I send out these vibrations, I don't quite know how to get over it, but I know I do it now.
"Yes, Last week I actually rang my daughter, I didn’t get her, so I left a message, to tell her, to pick me up at the airport. If I had got her, I probably wouldn’t have done that, but there is no way that I would ask my family to do things, but the parent thought was, THAT which you expect, therefore the vibrations that you send out.
Yes, this is why I have helped my friends over the years. I know when they say the things they do, they mean them at the time, it's just they never ever follow through with their promises, but if you love someone, you love them anyway, no matter what their faults or their good points, and I hope I am always around for them when they need me.
Bld I feel if it was really important for you to go out on that occasion then if you really needed a baby sitter you would have found one from somewhere anyway,
Sln We joined a circle in the end because we were starting to get really irritating, they would say yes, then didn’t turn up, let us down, but that didn’t stop me helping them in whichever way they needed, even though I had joined a circle I still helped, one friend eventually used to pay a student to come & baby sit her children.
Teacher: So she acknowledged her self.
Sln Yes in the end.
Teacher: Then there are more comments,
"Well only if I can help Dominica. I was telling Dominica earlier, what a "striver" she was in life. How, she sees a goal and goes all out to reach for it.
.But it is of ease for you to tell another. It is for Dominica...
"To find her self, yes.
"Could you re-phrase that, explain that.
Cl I misunderstood last week what word we are looking for, and I tried to analyse "loving" to find out what "loving" really meant. I finally came up with something this afternoon which was "CHARITY". That to accept people as they are.
"TO GIVE CHARITY, as you would expect charity, and have the same feelings towards people as you would want them to have towards you, and I thought that Charity was the nicest word I could find that analysed LOVE, to put it in a nutshell.
Bry I've also done quite a bit of reading about love, and give. Some people actually become door mats. I find it hard to describe it, where people love to such an extent that they are complete doormats, and I think somewhere along the line, I have missed something but I don't quite know what it is.
Teacher: Yes. Then consider charity.
Clara, you do well to mistake the word. (homework)
Charity is of great importance.
Bj - So perhaps those people are not being charitable to them self
Then, there are more queries or you wish your refreshment?
Tms - We will take a break.
Teacher: Then I shall return,
- TEA BREAK
Teacher: You have queries?
BrI'd like to enquire about KASS, my guide and what his last incarnation was,
Teacher: One moment.
"Thank you Abraham.
Teacher: A contented life,
"When you say seclusion, was he in a church or
Teacher: A monastic life.
Cl Could I ask the same question of my guide please, SIMONE?
Teacher: One moment,
A life of service to others, for others,
"As a person or religious.
Tms I've discovered something this week that has been going on at work for a while. Money is a bit tight and if we want to buy any equipment we have to go and ask the Boss for permission, and several people say it's a waste of time, you can't get any money out of him, he just won't spend it, and I said well that's funny, every time I go to him, I get O,K'ed, and the others said, you get anything you want, and I think it just must be that I go in there with a positive attitude, and I just explain what I want, why I want it, and I get the go-ahead, and the others say, how do you do it? Is it my personality, or the fact that I have gone in there with confidence, and I haven’t been turned down yet? There have been other people on the same level as me, same authority, they can't get anything.
Teacher: THOUGHT. THE POWER OF.
Teacher: Belinda, you have news, you have imparted to Reuben?
Bld Yes. We have been invited to go on a trip, Filip & I, back to our Home country, spend Christmas there with our family. We will be leaving in 2 weeks time, and we expect to be away for 6 months at the most, so it's going to be quite a journey.
Teacher: Another journey of discovery. Then, journey well.
Then if there are no more queries...I shall leave you with this....
"Sorry Abraham, could I just say something please?
Teacher: You may.
Bld It's to do with guides, when I first asked about my guide, I wanted information, and then you said at the time, you couldn’t give me information because it was very foggy, is it clearer now when you contact my guide?
Teacher: It is
Then. I leave you with this...
Martinus - says closing prayer