1995-04-20-Tallahassee, FL, Early Transcripts, Part 7
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- 2 Facilitators
- 3 Session 1
- 4 Session 2
- 5 Session 3
- 6 Session 4
- 7 Session 5
- 8 Session 6
Topic: Tallahassee Early Transcripts, Part 7
Group: Tallahassee TeaM
- You Need Not Be Perfect, Child
Good morning child, it is I Ambrose, he who loves you.
You are so hard on yourself. Lighten up child! Your world will yet have sunshine throughout. Your world is but suffering yet one more shadow, yet one more ramification of a rebellion that has yet to use up the energy that was set free.
You are at times a difficult student my dear, but only in that you strive so hard for perfection. Let go of your need to be perfect, child! You do not live on a perfect world. You live on a world where perfection is nigh unto impossible, even for those who are much higher than you are on their path toward the Father. You have but just begun; you are in essence, but a babe. Allow yourself that freedom JoiLin. Take off the shackles of self-imposed perfection. Allow yourself the freedom of the child that you are; learn, and love with a sense of joy, with the delight of a child, with the faith of a child. You understand what is meant when the Master spoke of having the faith of a child; children accept what their hearts tell them is true, they do not analyze, they accept. Their heart tells them it is so, and it makes perfect sense to them, and so they believe and they act on that belief. You have that sense of childlike faith when you allow it free reign. Do so JoiLin; it will make your life and your future education so much easier and so much more fun. Learning should be a pleasure; it should be a delight, not a dark shadow held over your head, but something to look forward to.
You continue to struggle with your preconceived notion of what your Father-time should be, again, go into it as a child, expecting nothing and giving your heart, you will see the time within opening as a flower to the sun, in freedom and joy. You cannot bind or control that time within, dear one! It must be allowed to evolve, freely, as it will, when you let go of the control. When you stop maintaining the role of stern master upon yourself. You are such a joy to us! If you could see yourself through our eyes, you would learn to love yourself as we do!
When Michael showed you how to let go of the pain you are holding within, he was responding to the pain you were suffering, as He will always respond to your needs, and so too will He respond when you come to Him with an open heart full of joy and a desire to share that joy with Him. He will always be there JoiLin, in sorrow and in joy, expect Him to be there! Do not close yourself off to what is already there. Open your heart child and let go the final walls that you hold within, recognize that as you do so beloved, you will be removing the final vestiges of pain and shadow, all those things that have kept you from seeing the full light that is both you and the Father within. Only then will you be clear to begin your work in earnest. The timing dear child is up to you. You alone hold the key. You alone have the power to accept fully the gift the Father holds out to you.
- Commitment Needed
Greetings JoiLin, it is I Will, your teacher who loves you.
We know of your concern child, and we ask you to let it go. Be of good cheer. We will be initiating a plan to be set in motion on this Sunday that will, we hope, rekindle the flame of commitment within your group. There has been a feeling of widespread apathy that we hope is beginning to run its course and can now be channeled into new energy, with a more creative direction.
You continue to struggle with your old concept of time, recognize that as your old paradigms fall away so too will your old ways of measuring time. These will be replaced with a time construct more in keeping with local universe time. It is, as ever, a matter of perspective. As more and more of humanity begin to take up their higher levels of being, their morontial states of mind and understanding will allow for many changes to coexist alongside of the current understandings. These new ways of viewing your world will eventually replace the old.
- You Perceive Yourself To Be An Integrated Human Being
Let us begin.
Today I would like to talk about your perception of yourself, child. It is good that in many ways you perceive yourself to be an altogether integrated human being. However, there are some negative repercussions to believing this to be so. Can you think of what any of these negatives might be?
JoiLin: Well, off hand I guess if I believed myself to be well adjusted, then I might not be seeking to discover how I could better adjust, or what I might look at in myself to discover why I did certain things or behaved in certain ways. If I believed that I had no problems, no personality weaknesses, than I would be standing still, at least in regard to emotional growth. I might also see myself as somehow superior to my brothers and sisters, as if they had problems, deficiencies, where I did not. I don’t know if I do that, but I see that as a possibility. Looking back to a conversation I had with a friend in the mission, where she was sharing about her personal difficulties, (read issues), I can remember thinking and maybe even saying, "I hate to tell you this, but I feel a bit guilty for not being able to relate to you on this; I guess I just don’t have those problems." However, in personal sessions I’ve had since that conversation, one, even with Michael (!), the teachers have indicated that I may have some problems that I’m not in touch with. So I see all of this that I’ve mentioned as negatives that would hinder my own personal spiritual/emotional growth.
Ambrose: Yes, child, it seems obvious to me, and I hope to you as well, that there is nothing lacking in your intellectual endowments; you are very much up to this task we set about. Can you see this JoiLin?
JoiLin: Yes, part of me has always been able to see that, but there’s this other part of me that feels inadequate, as if not having that degree somehow makes me a lesser candidate for intellectual ability.
Ambrose: Good, now we begin to uncover something we can work on together. And JoiLin, do not think that because you have these areas, and yes, there are other areas that as we move into this process a bit, and you become more comfortable with it, you will uncover. Do not believe yourself to be somehow diminished, to be somehow not as worthy, good, or as blessed as you indeed are. These difficulties are a common problem on your planet, and indeed on all of the rebellion affected planets to one degree or another. These are the kind of problems that most will begin to work on after they reach the first mansion world. You begin it now in preparation for your work in this mission. All members of this mission will sooner or later all come to this point on their path. It becomes necessary for each individual, in order to be the most effective in their outreach to others, that they be as clear and as integrated within their own beings as possible. You would not ask someone to help you that had some of the same problems you did, you would go to someone that did not have the same difficulties or social behaviors that you did. This is not to point the finger at you JoiLin; it was but an example, perhaps a poor one.
- Later that same day:
Ambrose: If you are ready we will pick up where we left off.
Looking within, endeavoring to recognize those areas, those trouble spots, if you will, serves on more than one level. As these areas are discovered, and you work with them to eliminate and overcome, you will in essence, be freeing yourself of so much that has been weighing you down. These things weigh on you child; even though your conscious mind has refused to recognize them; they do still affect your emotional well-being. Some of these will be seen to have been exhibiting altered behavior in areas other than the one affected. It is almost like a psychic echo. The problem is here, yet its effects show up in another area altogether. Many times this causes a problem for those in the health related fields, when they attempt to help a client. They begin to work in the area that the problem is manifesting, when in fact, the real difficulty lies in an entirely different area. But I digress, as you begin working on these problems, you free yourself to experience more fully, your existence.
Liken yourself to a balloon filled with sand that weighs it down and keeps it from flying. As the sand is replaced with air, you become more buoyant, more able to soar to heights not even seen by you from your current earth-bound position, if you will. So, as these areas begin to be healed, to be cleared of the pain and shadow that filled them, they will immediately become filled with the Father’s light, allowing you to more fully experience His love for you. This also allows you to more ably express this love to your brothers and sisters, in service to Him. We know this is your highest priority child, and we will move mountains, truly, we will do what it takes to help you realize this desired goal of service.
And there is yet another level that will be more accessible as this healing progresses; you will begin to discover within yourself child, much that you had only dreamed could be possible for you. You will discover abilities you never knew you had; your creativity will be opened and freed from the sand that weighed it down; and you will discover that you are much more able to help your brothers and sisters as well.
As you begin to reach out more and more from this lightened, more free place you will be in, the joy you will discover through doing this, will be so much more heightened than it is now. You only think you know what real joy is child, wait until you really experience it! Then we will talk again.
We are proud of you and your willingness to do the work necessary to be all you can be. Recognize this yourself, give yourself credit; you hold back the love from yourself that you so easily give to others. The Father would have you love yourself, as well, perhaps even first. For when we love ourselves, as the Father loves us, we truly become free to love others, as He would have us love them. We delight in you JoiLin. And we look forward to much progress within the coming months.
I leave you now, as I think we have covered enough ground for today, and we will pick up our lesson tomorrow if you have the opportunity. Know child how proud I am of you and that I am ever near and will respond if you call. Shalom.
- Areas For You To Heal
If you are ready, let us begin. Greetings child, I welcome you into this continuing classroom.
Yesterday we began to discuss problem areas within your own psyche, areas that need to be healed, and how you might see your inability to recognize this in yourself as a negative. And you gave some very good answers.
As you talked, you were able to uncover one area that does indeed, need to be brought to the light and healed. You think of yourself as being less able to compete on an intellectual level with your brothers and sisters that have had the opportunity of gaining a formal education and have received their piece of paper indicating that they have indeed put in the hours. Recognize JoiLin, that those hours we refer to are under the heading of formal education, and that piece of paper, a formal piece of paper, indicative of those hours spent working toward the degree. Living itself, is an education child, as well, you have always been an avid reader with a wide range of interests. Give yourself some credit for the knowledge you have attained on your own. And give yourself some credit here as well; you do not feel insecure with all of your siblings who have that formal piece of paper, it is only some few. If we look a bit deeper, you may be able to recognize that it really has naught to do with that piece of paper; it has more to do with personality conflicts. You will remember in our conversation yesterday when I spoke of difficulties a person experiences in one area that are echoed in or are manifested in another area? I believe this is true for you in this case. Look at the people you know that have their degrees, but with whom you are quite comfortable. If this were truly a problem of your feeling inadequate when in the presence of someone with a degree, this pattern would hold true within all of your relationships. And so, we think the difficulty lies more in the direction of the individual, and conflicts between you and your sibling that need to be worked on. Can you think of any other pattern or incident wherein as a child you were made to feel small or insignificant?
JoiLin: Yes, I think they mostly had to do with the way I felt about how I looked. My friends all had pretty clothes, they all began the school year with a whole new wardrobe, and my clothes were mostly hand-me-downs or from a consignment store. I remember one year when my dresses were all too short, and they called me Alice in wonderland; I knew it was not meant as a compliment. In addition to new clothes, they all wore make-up and I didn’t have any…. my mother wouldn’t even let me wear it if I had any.
JoiLin: Insignificant, I guess. Poor Little Match Girl syndrome, I suppose. Maybe I felt sorry for myself as well. I knew I wasn’t as pretty as they were, but I also knew it had mostly to do with all of the feminine trappings they had, it had more to do with the clothes they wore, the make-up they applied, and they way they had their hair cut and styled.
Ambrose: And how did you handle this?
Ambrose: Yes, child. Then you became quite proficient at your game of pretend, did you not? And this game has served you well through most of your life. It is only now, now that you begin to look and search for the patterns of your past behavior that dictate your present behavior, that you are beginning to recognize these games.
These games that people play JoiLin, are universal; they’re coping mechanisms, defense mechanisms; they serve an important role in our lives while we are at an immature level. It is only when we begin to mature and begin to step firmly upon the Father’s path, that we are even in a position to safely recognize these games or patterns and begin to remove them. You are now at that stage; you are secure enough in your knowledge of the Father's love for you, secure enough in your own understanding of yourself, as His beloved child, that you can safely begin to dig below the surface and discover what lies within that needs to be let go of, or exchanged for a higher pattern. Are you comfortable with this exploration child?
JoiLin: Yes, Ambrose, I am.
Ambrose: Do you have any questions JoiLin?
JoiLin: Not, not really. Perhaps maybe I would ask, how do I undo coping mechanisms that have been in place for all of these years? For instance, how do I stop pretending that I don’t care?
Ambrose: Oh, child, you have already begun and for the most part succeeded! Look at your past behavior JoiLin. You have not had to pretend that you don’t care except perhaps with the recent incident between you and your group member. You did indeed, apply that particular coping skill, but those times are going to less and less, and you will soon leave them behind. What you are doing right now, is attempting to bring to light all of the areas within that have gone unrecognized by you.
Through our conversation yesterday, you were able to recognize something about yourself that you believed to be a sense of insecurity when confronted by those with more formal education than you. As we bring these things to light and discuss them, you will be able to see the true root of the difficulty and let much of it go. There will be those few things that you will continue to hold on to and it will be those patterns we will work on healing.
Begin looking at the patterns within your day JoiLin, and then look backward, and try to see patterns within your week, and then look at patterns if you can, in the different segments of your life. Is there a pattern to your relationships? Is there a pattern to the way you relate or interact with your siblings? Is it different to the way you interact with your family? Are there patterns set up between you and different family members that may need to be exchanged for better ones? Look at all the areas of your life child, and try to recognize coping skills that are firmly in place, patterns that may have begun years ago when you were but a small child, and have been allowed to become cemented; have become the customary way of doing certain things, or acting in certain ways. When you have free time, free mental time, spend some of that time looking within and looking at your past behavior in all areas of your life and see if you can recognize any patterns. And please, do not misunderstand, there will be many good patterns that you will learn to recognize, and we want you to recognize both the healthy and the unhealthy. You will soon come to recognize on your own, it is our hope, that much of your behavior that was set firmly in the past, has within this past year, begun to change.
This has been due to your hard work JoiLin. This is due to your committed walk with the Father. Give yourself credit, each and every time you come to recognize the successes, the positive changes you have made, and child there have been many. Look for them. Recognize them, and benefit from that recognition, by seeing the light you are becoming.
I will close this session now child, as I know you have to pick up your grandson, but before I go, do you have any other questions that you would like to ask me?
JoiLin: When we do the session on the computer Ambrose, it seems somehow more fluid, somehow as if I’m able to stand even further apart from your words. Is there any validity to that or is it just my imagination?
Ambrose: There is always validity, JoiLin, since it’s something that you are feeling. I would recommend that we intermittently use both methods, and eventually we are hoping you will feel that same comfort level when speaking the words aloud. That you will be able to let go of the tension., the anxiety, and that the words will be able to come through more easily. Does that answer, child?
JoiLin: Yes, Ambrose, thank you. Thank you for your help and thank you for your love.
- All of Normal Mind Could Have a Teacher
Greetings child, it is I Ambrose, he who loves you. I thank you for taking the time to sit and allow me to voice a lesson through your fingertips! We are indeed, beginning to gain strength in this communication technique we attempt to up step. I appreciate your willingness to allow the free running conversation between our two minds as you have for the past two days. This builds stronger pathways between our minds and allows for better communication between us.
Much that you have written in your e-mail over these two days has been as you suspected, a flow between our two minds; this is what we have hoped for, as this is the most effective way for me to help you as you go about your daily life. It allows for more interaction between us; as we are limited when we can only communicate when a formal lesson is in progress. It this format comfortable for you child?
Ambrose: Do you have questions?
Ambrose: If at all possible, it would be helpful, but only in so far as the practice of speaking the words is concerned. If it is not comfortable for you to take the time, then by all means do what is most comfortable for you. The spoken session will always wait for a more convenient time.
Are you aware of what you just now began to feel, JoiLin? You were thinking that you would like a formal lesson, and then immediately, you were filled with anxiety, over wondering what the lesson would be about, what would the specific words be? Take a deep breath and try to allow this anxiousness to dissipate child.
All normal minded people on your planet at this time have the possibility of making contact with a teacher, and yes, there are as many different kinds of teachers as there are different kinds of students seeking them. All sincere seekers will be given the guidance they seek; no matter what school of thought they embrace. So you were correct child, when you said you thought this mission was a lot bigger than might have been thought at first. Remember, all paths lead to the Father, and that means that all seekers will find the Father through whatever path their sincere seeking leads them. All paths lead to the Father; none are excluded.
You were also correct in your thinking when you said that perhaps if a person genuinely sought the Father’s will in their life, and daily renewed that prayer/commitment, then they could be relatively certain that the path they were on does in fact incorporate the Father’s will for them. All of the experiences in your lives whether seen as positive or negative on this side of the physical life, will be seen and understood, when you leave behind the physical vessel. to have been leading you ever onward toward your eternal goal of fusion with the your Adjuster. All that has transpired in your lives does indeed help to prepare you for your future service to the Father and your siblings. The key to all of this is that you become a sincere seeker of the Father’s will for you. That is the only prerequisite for success in this initial venture, or this physical life that you live.
We will continue if you are willing, so that we can test your ability to stay focused on my words while there are distractions going on within the home. It will take a bit of concentration child, but I think you are up to it.
One of the things you have been wondering about is whether you are being helpful when you communicate with your cyberspace siblings. I think you already understand that this is indeed part of your ministry; that you are indeed doing the Father’s work when you reach out to your siblings in love and understanding. You have had enough personal feedback JoiLin to understand that this is a work that we, your teachers, see as a most helpful and productive one.
I can tell that we have reached the end of our patience! The distractions have taken you away at least enough for me to request that we take this up later or on the morrow. No, child, I am not finding fault with you. It is quite difficult, I understand, to concentrate with that sort of noisy distraction going on. I think you have done exceptionally well to have remained connected for a long as you have.
- All Life Carries The Seeds of Creation
Dear child, let us begin. It is I will, your teacher who loves you.
We appreciate your making the attempt to move beyond your present wall of fear. Continue to take that faith step child and you will soon find yourself again amid the sun, you will find yourself once again full of confidence in both the future and your own abilities. Trust us JoiLin, you will get through this, and when you do you will struggle with these doubts no more, at least not at this level.
Let us pick up on the lesson I wished to impart last evening at your group meeting, although as you can see, you were indeed given a lesson of much merit. Not hearing my words last evening did not cause your group to suffer any loss! Do not put that layer of self-reproach upon yourself, as it is entirely unnecessary.
The farmer, when he plows his fields turns over the earth, exposing new soil, soil that has not been used in the last planting. As well, does he add back to the earth the debris left over from the harvest, and by so doing, enriches the soil. Now, the newly exposed soil is rich in nutrients and ready to sustain the new crop while the old soil, being depleted, is once again going back to the earth as a means of restoring nutritional balance. So the dead, the old, gives itself back to that from which it sprang, thereby ensuring the continuation of the life cycle. All of life has within it the seeds to carry it further…. the seeds of creation lie hidden within the life vehicles of all living organisms.
You, as a will creature, have even more potential, as you do not just have the seeds of propagation, but you have the seeds of divinity as well! Think of it…. you are both mortal, and divine! You are all beginning to show signs of a desire to know where your responsibility lies, if any, toward this divine gift of the Father, that lies within. There is no easy answer, the best answer I can give you is this: your responsibility is whatever you make it to be, whatever you accept as your responsibility.
The greatest gift given to humankind by the Father in addition to the gift of Himself was the gift of free will choice. It is this gift that makes all of your life such an incredible adventure! Were it not for your ability to choose, life would indeed, become dull with very little joy or discovery; it would no longer be such an adventure.
Learn to accept that each of you walk your own individual paths…all heading in the same approximate direction…all being reacted upon by different currents, different winds of growth yet all leading to the same eventual goal; learning to let go of the self imposed expectations we have, either for ourselves or for others, is one of the toughest lessons to learn, yet the sooner it is learned, the sooner greater leaps of growth will be possible.
You are feeling as it this is all just rhetoric, with no design. Turn up the contrast on the screen child and see that it does indeed have a recognizable flow from one thought into the next. There, you see? Letting go and simply letting be what will, is the easiest way I know to let this communication evolve. If for instance, you had felt secure enough last evening to take a deep breath, and pretend that it was just us, at home here, where you feel safe, you might have been able to get over this last impediment to your development as a receiver. This is not criticism child, as you well know, I would simply help you to see that the end is in sight. You have but to, as you say on this world, bite the bullet!
If you have the time later in the day, try to sit for a few moments at the recorder and let us work together again; this moving between the computer and the recorder will help to strengthen our connection. Go child into your day knowing that you are indeed in His watch care, and have many that would assist you as you reach further into His light. Shalom.