2001-03-08-Ending Friendships, Drugs

Session

Opening

Greetings children, I am Ham and I am grateful that you have all come this evening. Tonight we shall discuss friendship. What does it mean to be a friend? We all consider our friendships valuable and yet how little effort is directed toward these relationships. Being a friend means first to reach out toward another to offer the hand of friendship, as it were, without thought of reward. Having the intention of friendship is what guides your actions.

Lesson

When the Master went about in his earthly life he intended to be a friend to each person that he met. This intention allowed him to watch for little kindnesses that he might do for another. As he passee by, his intention was friendly toward each person that came his way. He thought of his many followers as his friends. He made their friendship by his intention. They, in turn, devoted their lives to him. The purity of your intention to friendship will help determine the loyalty of that friend.

Not everyone knows how to reach out in friendship, but everyone knows how to respond in friendship. The Master was always loyal to his friends. Even was he loyal to Judas unto the last. He allowed a friend to betray him before he would betray that friend. As you pass by in life, as you come into contact with people, open your heart as purely as possible with friendly intentions and you will gather friend like casting a net and gathering fish. They will remain loyal to you throughout your life is your intention is pure enough.

Allow yourself to be used before you would use another. Pray for those who do not know how to be friends. Heal those friendships which may have little tears or misunderstandings which have stained the relationship. If you pray for that person long enough, you will find a way in your heart to repair that friendship. Often times there are those who harden their hearts against you for whatever reason it may be and I say to you that even the hardest rock dissolves gradually to a steady stream of life-giving water. Be diligent in your kindness. Continue to show love for all manner of evil done to you. Show only kindness, love and understanding and that rock, will in fact, dissolve.

Human beings have difficulty allowing friendship enough time. In previous days on your world, towns were small and extended families large. People went through their lives with a network of relationships surrounding them. They were forced to resolve conflicts and saw over time that the breaks of the past can be healed. In your fast-paced world, it is easy to break off with friends or spouses and completely separate and have no further contact. People are not forced to stay together over long periods, so you don't have to work everything out - it is easy to drop it and go your own way. You must, instead, learn what your ancestors knew, that time heals all wounds, and that if you work things out long enough - they will work.

People are not disposable units. It is valuable in this group that you have these associations over a long period of time and you allow yourselves to change. You give each other room to grow as you are growing, and you adapt to each other over the yeas. This is wonderful to see. The friendships you have formed and forged in this group will remain with you throughout your lives. Be at peace with yourselves and with each other...allow time to pass as you work through the many intricacies of such intimate friendships. Don't think that you have to solve everything at once. Open your hearts in love for each other, pray for each other or for the group as a whole and always let your intentions be toward pure friendship, asking nothing - receiving the other person in a completeness in the most complete way that you can. Have faith and trust, my children - trust in Jesus enough to follow in his footsteps and be a friend to all as you pass by.

Are there any questions at this time?

Dialogue

Hal: You know there is a new thing going on now unfamiliar to our culture where young people go to school and shoot people and teachers - that never used to happen - can you explain that phenomenon?

Ham: Well, there are many factors, of course. There is such a great loss of family and community cohesion. Young people feel quite alone and adrift in the world. Your society has gone very far in the secular direction, where there is little sense of community faith. Personality isolation is very frightening, especially for young people. They are confused in the conflicting messages they receive in the adult world. Is there a God, is there not a God??? Am I alone in the universe??? These shootings are linked to suicide where suicide is a solitary act, these shootings are acts of the most extreme pain and sense of being completely lost and wanting to inflict that pain on to others. Mixed with that is a wanting to draw attention to that pain, to themselves. To have a moment, if they are not love, they are feared and noticed So that their lives are not insignificant. It is very sad and your country collectively shakes its head and asks, how did we come to this, but the roots were planted long ago. Is this helping?

Hal: Yes. I was thinking and wondering if TV makes a difference - because when I was in school . . . people were picked on, but nobody ever thought of these acts. Has the line between reality and unreality been blurred - you know what I'm trying to ask, I'm sure.

Ham: Yes. Your entertainment has glorified violence for a long time and presented it as a solution to every problem, but also, the publicity gained by these acts is a motivating factor for the children, yes.

Hal: Thank You

I have a question: Recently I had to end a friendship, and I wonder if I handled it in the most loving way, in the way that the Father would have handled it?

Ham: Well, my son, these kinds of situations are always difficult. I cannot say that you handled it in a perfectly God-like way, because this is a human interaction, and thus had to be handled in a human way, as loving as it could be. You must each now find your own strength to go forward and find forgiveness for each other in your hearts and eventual acceptance. Be at ease my son.

Ham - there's a term I hear lately called Toxic Friendship and it refers to friendships that are really negative and draining . . . .

Ham: Yes, of course. Very often your love is rejected or manipulated. As people grow, especially in man and woman relationships, which are the closest and most intense relationships, often times one person will grow in the spirit, and the other one is not ready to move that far yet. And may be very resentful of the person who is growing. In this situation, the Father is actually allowing you to separate. It is said that the Father brings two people together until such time as he wills them apart. And this may happen many times in he course of one's life and it does not mean that you are somehow failing and often times it only means that you are growing. When the Father truly brings two people together, they will stay together and no force can pull them apart. Simply understand that if you are going through a time when you are going through different relationships, this is a time of growth, even a time of preparing with someone who will last a much longer time. Is this helping

Hal: Yes, I was smoking some very good medicine at the time, and my question would be if it's appropriate to seek additional enlightenment through such herbs, or rather should we take the long path to enlightenment through meditation and a concentration on stillness and the spiritual contemplation?

Ham: The use of various drugs can be a two-edged sword. On the one hand, it can allow you flashes of insight, but on the other hand, it can make it easier for you to believe your own illusions. After a while, it is hard to tell which is which. These questions are for you, yourself to answer. Each person must make these decisions for themselves. I will say, though, that the spiritual path, in the long run, is not necessarily well served. Use these substances in moderation and with caution. That is all.