2001-04-12-Loneliness

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Topic: Loneliness

Group: Nashville TeaM

Facilitators

Teacher: Ham

TR: Rebecca

Session

Opening

Greetings, children, I am Ham and I am grateful that you have chosen this evening to be with me. Tonight, let us discuss loneliness and how you can help your selves to get through these periods.

Lesson

Loneliness, Love

Loneliness is a very difficult state to be in. One can be very lonely, even when surrounded by others. What helps to alleviate these feelings is true human connection, real understanding between people. Without this feeling of connection or complete empathy with another human being on a fairly regular basis, the heart becomes quite confused and it is easy to question your value and your place in the universe.

Many fears are generated from the lack of human connection. Each human being has to feel understood and feel that they have the capacity to understand someone else. Isolation is probably the most feared situation. Human beings are not meant to be isolated. You are meant to love and be loved.

Casual human interaction does not alleviate the sense of loneliness. Loneliness is relieved through loving and in feeling love. One must love God with all one's heart and soul, but to feel truly connected with God, one must also love another human being. We have spoken often of the joy of showing love.

Even if you are going through a period without that deep emotional connection with another person, there is still so much joy in loving those that you do know that you have connection with even if it is not truly deep. When you love another person, your connection with that person is automatically deepened. You automatically feel more empathy and understanding for that person when first you decide to love them.

Life is too short to require that your love be coaxed from you or that you should require love from another before your love is released. Love others with an open heart, enjoy the feeling of loving. Others will come to you in time, people that you are meant to share a deep bonding with. But always throughout your lives, the most joy producing thing you can do is to love another person.

You see you really are brothers and sisters. Love each other with that unconditional surrender of feeling as you would your closest sibling and in this you will find the richness and joy of living.

How simple this lesson is tonight and yet it is one that takes a lifetime to learn. People are very much given to behaving like wounded animals. When you feel emotional pain, your first reaction is to withdraw from human contact and, yet, it is always human contact and love that heals emotional pain.

Sometimes there are situations which we have no control over the outcome where the actions of others can seem completely unjust and unwarranted. This the time when you must learn to pray for those people, those very people who hurt you and over time as you pray for them, you will find yourselves opening to love and it is this love that will ultimately heal any wounds that occur.

Pray for everyone who has ever harmed you or who has harmed those you love. Pray for all those who have used you in spite, who have taken advantage of your generosity, who have trampled on your feelings. Pray for people who have done deliberate harm to others. Pray that all human beings who have become lost and are wandering in the darkness will see the light and begin to repent and move back toward the Father.

How difficult this is. It is very hard to overcome your animal feelings of animosity, hatred, thoughts of vengeance, thoughts of revenge, thoughts of they'll be sorry when... All these things are natural human emotions and yet the spirit calls upon you to overcome these feelings.

Gradually, person by person, this entire world is being taught the simple gospel, the true living words of a man who lived in Galilee 2,000 years ago. Gradually, the truth of his message and the drawing power of his love will overcome all of the baser human tendencies which breed suspicion, prejudice, pride, hatred, and violence. The Prince of Peace will indeed draw all men to him and none will ever be lonely once he has come to your side.

In order to welcome him, to banish loneliness from your lives, you must truly learn to follow him. Following him means holding up his example, all the time, and especially during times that are trying and heart wrenching and difficult. Remember that the Master endured all that you are enduring and more. He knows just exactly how you feel and he calls you to a higher feeling, to be like he was and to love your enemies.

It is true that you can feel his presence beside you as you live your lives even has he felt the close and enduring presence of the Father in Heaven beside him during his life. He lived his life to give you God as a person, God as a human being as you are human beings. His bestowal enabled him to send out his sprit, his human heart, to be with you much closer and more personal than ever could have been achieved before the bestowal.

Forever and always, is he God and man. So indeed, he can be your closest friend and truly the light which will banish darkness and loneliness from your lives forever. Follow him my children, follow his example, open your hearts to his presence, and to the Father's love which flows throughout the universe. Have complete faith that you can be his closest companion and that he will be yours.

Come to him. Be like him. Have love for all even as he loves even the most wicked of his children. Rise in your hearts to do the same.

Are there any questions at this time.

Dialogue

Stillness

Q. Ham, do you still encourage us to practice the silence?

Ham: Yes of course. The stillness for a certain time period every day brings a sense of balance and proportion into your lives. Having a time period where you are alone with God is essential to opening up spiritual channels but this must not be done to the exclusion of human interaction. It was this that we discourage.

Law, Justice

Q: As a society we are about to put to death Timothy McVeigh for killing hundreds of people. In your lesson you said we should give love for hate. Is it alright to put someone to death for an atrocity like this?

Ham: This is a very good question. We do not interfere with the punishments that any human society should deem appropriate in retribution for criminal acts. Society has to have mechanisms which protect the greater law abiding majority from the antisocial, confused, perhaps even mentally ill or deranged sub population. As your world evolves, there will certainly be changes made in your criminal justice system. But we certainly are not here to pass judgement on what is appropriate in this type of situation. It is consistent to send love and prayers for someone who is to receive the just punishment meted out by your society. Sentencing someone to physical death is not sentencing someone to eternal hell. It is simply moving forward there time of judgment in a higher court, so to speak. Human justice is always flawed. It is never perfect. Divine justice is perfect.

Control

Q: I have a question of how to love better. It seems there is a kind of love that empowers and a kind of love that keeps people in a situation of dependency. Do you have any wisdom for me in my situation to have love that empowers instead of love that cripples.

Ham: Certainly, my daughter. Love is always empowering, but sometimes the actions of the lover can not be so empowering to the beloved. Human beings are not perfect. All of you have unconscious patterns which manifest in your lives. You are not completely in the rational drivers seat most of the time. And, it is very hard for you to judge what is truly best for someone because you cannot judge what is best for you. Sometimes it is easy to go overboard and label everything as co-dependency. But, there must be room in life for some simple acts of help and kindness and support. We spoke of a high ideal of independence that your society seems to hold as a standard, but human beings are really meant to help each other through life. There are none so strong who do not require the love and aid of others. In other words, when you love, love your own way. Don't try to make it some other way that is better, love how you love right now and allow others to do the same. Then you can grow together.

Q: Ham I am going through a situation that is challenging my patience like it has never been tested before. Can you give me some words of wisdom about how to manifest perfect timing around a situation and advice on how to put my patience in the back seat, so to speak.

Ham: Well, it's easy my daughter. There are simply some things which you cannot control. Life is filled with different kinds of train wrecks that are the seeming result of bad timing, so to speak. And yet, look again. There is always some good that comes as the result of something that seems to be quite evil. Acts of evil, injustice, and cruelty do not multiply, necessarily, they have a tendency to feed in on themselves. But, the love and understanding, the spiritual growth which comes out of these acts of human failure do multiply. Spiritual growth always feeds and creates more spiritual growth among others. The good repercussions can be immense from something which seems to have no reason at all. There was a terrible tragedy in Oklahoma City, a senseless murderous act. And yet the love, the growth, the spiritual connection between people reverberated throughout the country and indeed through out the world. What you are experiencing is very small compared with something like that. And look again, look at the growth you have experienced already and the change that your life is undergoing will continue to reverberate in the changes that you make in the lives of others. The good eventually will completely outshine the evil, it always does. Have faith.

Acceptance

Q: I need your advice. Last week I was fired because of breaking a company policy.... When I try to think about what I want to do I feel blocked. What is the path that I should follow. What is blocking me? How can I make better decisions?

Ham: To get through this, you must first work through your resentment towards those former coworkers. This resentment is a very human thing. But, it is important that you now pray for those people, pray for understanding of them. Often times in life, there are times when certain doors close and that is exactly what is supposed to happen. That is what the Father's will is for you. But, to move forward, to move beyond that closed door, you must not hold any old feelings about that situation which keep drawing you back there in your mind and emotions. Pray for those people until you can feel love for them. Once you really feel this and have sympathy for them and understanding, then you will be free to move on. Trust that the Father will open that door which is meant to be opened. Do not blame yourself, do not blame others. Simply accept everything as it is with love in your heart for all.