Changes

If you are ready, let us begin. Greetings child, I welcome you into this continuing classroom.

If you are ready, let us begin. Greetings child, I welcome you into this continuing classroom.

===Lesson===

===Lesson===

Yesterday we began to discuss problem areas within your own psyche, areas that need to be healed, and how you might see your inability to recognize this in yourself as a negative. And you gave some very good answers.

Yesterday we began to discuss [[problem]] areas within your own [[psyche]], areas that need to be [[healed]], and how you might see your inability to [[recognize]] this in yourself as a [[negative]]. And you gave some very good answers.

As you talked, you were able to uncover one area that does indeed, need to be brought to the light and healed. You think of yourself as being less able to compete on an intellectual level with your brothers and sisters that have had the opportunity of gaining a formal education and have received their piece of paper indicating that they have indeed put in the hours. Recognize JoiLin, that those hours we refer to are under the heading of formal education, and that piece of paper, a formal piece of paper, indicative of those hours spent working toward the degree. Living itself, is an education child, as well, you have always been an avid reader with a wide range of interests. Give yourself some credit for the knowledge you have attained on your own. And give yourself some credit here as well; you do not feel insecure with all of your siblings who have that formal piece of paper, it is only some few. If we look a bit deeper, you may be able to recognize that it really has naught to do with that piece of paper; it has more to do with personality conflicts. You will remember in our conversation yesterday when I spoke of difficulties a person experiences in one area that are echoed in or are manifested in another area? I believe this is true for you in this case. Look at the people you know that have their degrees, but with whom you are quite comfortable. If this were truly a problem of your feeling inadequate when in the presence of someone with a degree, this pattern would hold true within all of your relationships. And so, we think the difficulty lies more in the direction of the individual, and conflicts between you and your sibling that need to be worked on. Can you think of any other pattern or incident wherein as a child you were made to feel small or insignificant?

As you talked, you were able to uncover one area that does indeed, need to be brought to the [[light]] and [[healed]]. You think of yourself as being less able to [[compete]] on an [[intellectual]] level with your [[brothers and sisters]] that have had the [[opportunity]] of gaining a formal [[education]] and have received their piece of paper indicating that they have indeed put in the hours. Recognize JoiLin, that those hours we refer to are under the heading of formal education, and that piece of paper, a formal piece of paper, indicative of those hours spent working toward the degree. [[Life|Living]] itself, is an [[education]] child, as well, you have always been an avid [[reader]] with a wide range of interests. Give yourself some credit for the [[knowledge]] you have [[attained]] on your own. And give yourself some credit here as well; you do not [[feel]] insecure with all of your [[siblings]] who have that formal piece of paper, it is only some few. If we look a bit deeper, you may be able to [[recognize]] that it really has naught to do with that piece of paper; it has more to do with [[personality]] [[conflicts]]. You will remember in our [[conversation]] yesterday when I spoke of difficulties a [[person]] [[experiences]] in one area that are [[echoed]] in or are manifested in another area? I believe this is true for you in this case. Look at the people you know that have their degrees, but with whom you are quite comfortable. If this were truly a [[problem]] of your [[feeling]] inadequate when in the [[presence]] of someone with a [[degree]], this pattern would hold true within all of your [[relationships]]. And so, we think the difficulty lies more in the direction of the [[individual]], and [[conflicts]] between you and your sibling that need to be worked on. Can you think of any other pattern or incident wherein as a child you were made to feel small or insignificant?

===Dialogue===

===Dialogue===

JoiLin: Yes, I think they mostly had to do with the way I felt about how I looked. My friends all had pretty clothes, they all began the school year with a whole new wardrobe, and my clothes were mostly hand-me-downs or from a consignment store. I remember one year when my dresses were all too short, and they called me Alice in wonderland; I knew it was not meant as a compliment. In addition to new clothes, they all wore make-up and I didn’t have any…. my mother wouldn’t even let me wear it if I had any.

JoiLin: Yes, I think they mostly had to do with the way I felt about how I looked. My [[friends]] all had pretty [[clothes]], they all began the school year with a whole new wardrobe, and my clothes were mostly hand-me-downs or from a consignment store. I remember one year when my dresses were all too short, and they called me Alice in wonderland; I knew it was not meant as a compliment. In addition to new clothes, they all wore make-up and I didn’t have any…. my mother wouldn’t even let me wear it if I had any.

Ambrose: And how did it make you feel? Not having these things?

Ambrose: And how did it make you [[feel]]? Not having these [[things]]?

JoiLin: Insignificant, I guess. Poor Little Match Girl syndrome, I suppose. Maybe I felt sorry for myself as well. I knew I wasn’t as pretty as they were, but I also knew it had mostly to do with all of the feminine trappings they had, it had more to do with the clothes they wore, the make-up they applied, and they way they had their hair cut and styled.

JoiLin: Insignificant, I guess. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Little_Match_Girl Poor Little Match Girl syndrome], I suppose. Maybe I felt sorry for myself as well. I knew I wasn’t as pretty as they were, but I also knew it had mostly to do with all of the [[feminine]] trappings they had, it had more to do with the [[clothes]] they wore, the make-up they applied, and they way they had their hair cut and styled.

Ambrose: And how did you handle this?

Ambrose: And how did you handle this?

JoiLin: I guess I hid behind an attitude of, "I don’t care, it’s not important". I pretended it didn’t matter to me.

JoiLin: I guess I hid behind an [[attitude]] of, "I don’t [[care]], it’s not important". I pretended it didn’t matter to me.

Ambrose: Yes, child. Then you became quite proficient at your game of pretend, did you not? And this game has served you well through most of your life. It is only now, now that you begin to look and search for the patterns of your past behavior that dictate your present behavior, that you are beginning to recognize these games.

Ambrose: Yes, child. Then you became quite proficient at your [[game]] of pretend, did you not? And this game has served you well through most of your [[life]]. It is only now, now that you begin to look and search for the [[patterns]] of your [[past]] [[behavior]] that dictate your present behavior, that you are beginning to recognize these [[games]].

These games that people play JoiLin, are universal; they’re coping mechanisms, defense mechanisms; they serve an important role in our lives while we are at an immature level. It is only when we begin to mature and begin to step firmly upon the Father’s path, that we are even in a position to safely recognize these games or patterns and begin to remove them. You are now at that stage; you are secure enough in your knowledge of the Father’s love for you, secure enough in your own understanding of yourself, as His beloved child, that you can safely begin to dig below the surface and discover what lies within that needs to be let go of, or exchanged for a higher pattern. Are you comfortable with this exploration child?

These games that people play JoiLin, are [[universal]]; they’re coping mechanisms, [[defense]] mechanisms; they serve an important role in our lives while we are at an immature level. It is only when we begin to [[mature]] and begin to step firmly upon [[the Father]]’s path, that we are even in a [[position]] to safely recognize these games or patterns and begin to remove them. You are now at that [[stage]]; you are [[secure]] enough in your [[knowledge]] of [[the Father]]'s love for you, secure enough in your own [[understanding]] of yourself, as His beloved child, that you can safely begin to dig below the [[surface]] and discover what lies within that needs to be let go of, or exchanged for a higher [[pattern]]. Are you [[comfortable]] with this exploration child?

JoiLin: Yes, Ambrose, I am.

JoiLin: Yes, Ambrose, I am.

Ambrose: Do you have any questions JoiLin?

Ambrose: Do you have any questions JoiLin?

JoiLin: Not, not really. Perhaps maybe I would ask, how do I undo coping mechanisms that have been in place for all of these years? For instance, how do I stop pretending that I don’t care?

JoiLin: Not, not really. Perhaps maybe I would ask, how do I undo coping mechanisms that have been in place for all of these years? For instance, how do I stop pretending that I don’t [[care]]?

Ambrose: Oh, child, you have already begun and for the most part succeeded! Look at your past behavior JoiLin. You have not had to pretend that you don’t care except perhaps with the recent incident between you and your group member. You did indeed, apply that particular coping skill, but those times are going to less and less, and you will soon leave them behind. What you are doing right now, is attempting to bring to light all of the areas within that have gone unrecognized by you.

Ambrose: Oh, child, you have already begun and for the most part succeeded! Look at your past [[behavior]] JoiLin. You have not had to pretend that you don’t [[care]] except perhaps with the recent incident between you and your group member. You did indeed, apply that particular coping [[skill]], but those times are going to less and less, and you will soon leave them behind. What you are doing right now, is attempting to bring to [[light]] all of the areas within that have gone unrecognized by you.

Through our conversation yesterday, you were able to recognize something about yourself that you believed to be a sense of insecurity when confronted by those with more formal education than you. As we bring these things to light and discuss them, you will be able to see the true root of the difficulty and let much of it go. There will be those few things that you will continue to hold on to and it will be those patterns we will work on healing.

Through our [[conversation]] yesterday, you were able to [[recognize]] something about yourself that you believed to be a sense of insecurity when confronted by those with more formal [[education]] than you. As we bring these things to [[light]] and [[discuss]] them, you will be able to see the true [[root]] of the [[difficulty]] and let much of it go. There will be those few things that you will continue to hold on to and it will be those patterns we will work on [[healing]].

Begin looking at the patterns within your day JoiLin, and then look backward, and try to see patterns within your week, and then look at patterns if you can, in the different segments of your life. Is there a pattern to your relationships? Is there a pattern to the way you relate or interact with your siblings? Is it different to the way you interact with your family? Are there patterns set up between you and different family members that may need to be exchanged for better ones? Look at all the areas of your life child, and try to recognize coping skills that are firmly in place, patterns that may have begun years ago when you were but a small child, and have been allowed to become cemented; have become the customary way of doing certain things, or acting in certain ways. When you have free time, free mental time, spend some of that time looking within and looking at your past behavior in all areas of your life and see if you can recognize any patterns. And please, do not misunderstand, there will be many good patterns that you will learn to recognize, and we want you to recognize both the healthy and the unhealthy. You will soon come to recognize on your own, it is our hope, that much of your behavior that was set firmly in the past, has within this past year, begun to change.

Begin looking at the patterns within your day JoiLin, and then look backward, and try to see [[patterns]] within your week, and then look at patterns if you can, in the different segments of your [[life]]. Is there a pattern to your [[relationships]]? Is there a pattern to the way you relate or [[interact]] with your siblings? Is it different to the way you interact with your [[family]]? Are there patterns set up between you and different [[family]] members that may need to be exchanged for better ones? Look at all the areas of your [[life]] child, and try to recognize coping [[skills]] that are firmly in place, patterns that may have begun years ago when you were but a small child, and have been allowed to become cemented; have become the customary way of doing certain things, or acting in certain ways. When you have [[free]] time, free mental time, spend some of that time looking within and looking at your past [[behavior]] in all areas of your life and see if you can recognize any patterns. And please, do not misunderstand, there will be many [[good]] patterns that you will learn to recognize, and we want you to recognize both the [[healthy]] and the unhealthy. You will soon come to recognize on your own, it is our [[hope]], that much of your behavior that was set firmly in the [[past]], has within this past year, begun to [[change]].

This has been due to your hard work JoiLin. This is due to your committed walk with the Father. Give yourself credit, each and every time you come to recognize the successes, the positive changes you have made, and child there have been many. Look for them. Recognize them, and benefit from that recognition, by seeing the light you are becoming.

This has been due to your hard work JoiLin. This is due to your [[committed]] walk with [[the Father]]. Give yourself credit, each and every time you come to recognize the [[successes]], the [[positive]] changes you have made, and child there have been many. Look for them. [[Recognize]] them, and benefit from that recognition, by seeing the light you are [[becoming]].

===Closing===

===Closing===

I will close this session now child, as I know you have to pick up your grandson, but before I go, do you have any other questions that you would like to ask me?

I will close this session now child, as I know you have to pick up your grandson, but before I go, do you have any other [[questions]] that you would like to ask me?

JoiLin: When we do the session on the computer Ambrose, it seems somehow more fluid, somehow as if I’m able to stand even further apart from your words. Is there any validity to that or is it just my imagination?

JoiLin: When we do the session on the computer Ambrose, it seems somehow more [[fluid]], somehow as if I’m able to stand even further apart from your words. Is there any validity to that or is it just my [[imagination]]?

Ambrose: There is always validity, JoiLin, since it’s something that you are feeling. I would recommend that we intermittently use both methods, and eventually we are hoping you will feel that same comfort level when speaking the words aloud. That you will be able to let go of the tension., the anxiety, and that the words will be able to come through more easily. Does that answer, child?

Ambrose: There is always validity, JoiLin, since it’s something that you are [[feeling]]. I would recommend that we intermittently use both [[methods]], and [[eventually]] we are hoping you will feel that same [[comfort]] level when speaking the [[words]] aloud. That you will be able to let go of the [[tension]]., the [[anxiety]], and that the words will be able to come through more easily. Does that answer, child?

JoiLin: Yes, Ambrose, thank you. Thank you for your help and thank you for your love.

JoiLin: Yes, Ambrose, thank you. Thank you for your help and thank you for your love.

Ambrose: You’re most welcome child, and I thank you. You give me much joy. Until tomorrow, shalom.

Ambrose: You’re most welcome child, and I thank you. You give me much [[joy]]. Until tomorrow, [[shalom]].

 

==Session 5==

==Session 5==

*5-02-95

*5-02-95