Changes

==83:2. COURTSHIP AND BETROTHAL==

==83:2. COURTSHIP AND BETROTHAL==

83:2.1 [[Primitive]] marriages were always [[planned]] by the [[parents]] of the boy and girl. The [[transition]] [[stage]] between this [[custom]] and the times of [[free]] [[choosing]] was occupied by the marriage [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broker broker] or [[professional]] [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matchmaking matchmaker]. These matchmakers were at first the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barber barbers]; later, the [[priests]]. Marriage was originally a [[group]] affair; then a [[family]] matter; only recently has it become an [[individual]] [[adventure]].

83:2.1 [[Primitive]] marriages were always [[planned]] by the [[parents]] of the boy and girl. The [[transition]] [[stage]] between this [[custom]] and the times of [[free]] [[choosing]] was occupied by the marriage [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broker broker] or [[professional]] [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matchmaking matchmaker]. These matchmakers were at first the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barber barbers]; later, the [[priests]]. Marriage was originally a [[group]] affair; then a [[family]] matter; only recently has it become an [[individual]] [[adventure]].

83:2.2 [[Coercion]], not [[attraction]], was the approach to [[primitive]] marriage. In early times [[woman]] had no [[sex]] aloofness, only sex inferiority as inculcated by the [[mores]]. As [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theft raiding] preceded [[trading]], so marriage by capture preceded marriage by [[contract]]. Some [[women]] would connive at capture in order to [[escape]] the [[domination]] of the older men of their [[tribe]]; they preferred to fall into the hands of men of their own age from another [[tribe]]. This pseudo [[elopement]] was the [[transition]] [[stage]] between capture by [[force]] and subsequent [[courtship]] by [[charming]].

83:2.2 [[Coercion]], not [[attraction]], was the approach to [[primitive]] marriage. In early times [[woman]] had no [[sex]] aloofness, only sex inferiority as inculcated by the [[mores]]. As [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theft raiding] preceded [[trading]], so marriage by capture preceded marriage by [[contract]]. Some [[women]] would connive at capture in order to [[escape]] the [[domination]] of the older men of their [[tribe]]; they preferred to fall into the hands of men of their own age from another [[tribe]]. This pseudo [[elopement]] was the [[transition]] [[stage]] between capture by [[force]] and subsequent [[courtship]] by [[charming]].

83:2.3 An early type of [[wedding]] [[ceremony]] was the mimic flight, a sort of [[elopement]] [[rehearsal]] which was once a common [[practice]]. Later, mock capture became a part of the regular wedding [[ceremony]]. A [[modern]] girl's pretensions to resist "capture," to be reticent toward marriage, are all [[relics]] of olden [[customs]]. The carrying of the bride over the [[threshold]] is reminiscent of a [[number]] of [[ancient]] [[practices]], among others, of the days of [[wife]] [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theft stealing].

83:2.3 An early type of [[wedding]] [[ceremony]] was the mimic flight, a sort of [[elopement]] [[rehearsal]] which was once a common [[practice]]. Later, mock capture became a part of the regular wedding [[ceremony]]. A [[modern]] girl's pretensions to resist "capture," to be reticent toward marriage, are all [[relics]] of olden [[customs]]. The carrying of the bride over the [[threshold]] is reminiscent of a [[number]] of [[ancient]] [[practices]], among others, of the days of [[wife]] [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theft stealing].

83:2.4 [[Woman]] was long denied full [[freedom]] of self-disposal in marriage, but the more [[intelligent]] women have always been able to circumvent this restriction by the clever [[exercise]] of their wits. Man has usually taken the [[lead]] in [[courtship]], but not always. Woman sometimes [[formally]], as well as [[covertly]], [[initiates]] marriage. And as [[civilization]] has [[progressed]], women have had an increasing part in all [[phases]] of [[courtship]] and marriage.

83:2.4 [[Woman]] was long denied full [[freedom]] of self-disposal in marriage, but the more [[intelligent]] women have always been able to circumvent this restriction by the clever [[exercise]] of their wits. Man has usually taken the [[lead]] in [[courtship]], but not always. Woman sometimes [[formally]], as well as [[covertly]], [[initiates]] marriage. And as [[civilization]] has [[progressed]], women have had an increasing part in all [[phases]] of [[courtship]] and marriage.

==83:3. PURCHASE AND DOWRY==

==83:3. PURCHASE AND DOWRY==

83:3.1 The [[ancients]] mistrusted [[love]] and [[promises]]; they thought that abiding [[unions]] must be guaranteed by some tangible [[security]], [[property]]. For this reason, the purchase price of a [[wife]] was regarded as a forfeit or deposit which the [[husband]] was [[doomed]] to lose in case of [[divorce]] or desertion. Once the purchase price of a bride had been paid, many [[tribes]] permitted the [[husband]]'s brand to be burned upon her. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Africa Africans] still buy their wives. A [[love]] [[wife]], or a white man's wife, they [[compare]] to a cat because she costs nothing.

83:3.1 The [[ancients]] mistrusted [[love]] and [[promises]]; they thought that abiding [[unions]] must be guaranteed by some tangible [[security]], [[property]]. For this reason, the purchase price of a [[wife]] was regarded as a forfeit or deposit which the [[husband]] was [[doomed]] to lose in case of [[divorce]] or desertion. Once the purchase price of a bride had been paid, many [[tribes]] permitted the [[husband]]'s brand to be burned upon her. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Africa Africans] still buy their wives. A [[love]] [[wife]], or a white man's wife, they [[compare]] to a cat because she costs nothing.

83:3.2 The [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bride bride] shows were occasions for [[dressing]] up and decorating daughters for [[public]] exhibition with the [[idea]] of their bringing higher prices as [[wives]]. But they were not sold as [[animals]]—among the later [[tribes]] such a [[wife]] was not transferable. Neither was her purchase always just a cold-blooded [[money]] [[transaction]]; [[service]] was equivalent to cash in the purchase of a wife. If an otherwise desirable man could not pay for his wife, he could be [[adopted]] as a son by the girl's [[father]] and then could marry. And if a poor man sought a wife and could not meet the price demanded by a grasping [[father]], the [[elders]] would often bring [[pressure]] to bear upon the [[father]] which would result in a [[modification]] of his demands, or else there might be an [[elopement]].

83:3.2 The [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bride bride] shows were occasions for [[dressing]] up and decorating daughters for [[public]] exhibition with the [[idea]] of their bringing higher prices as [[wives]]. But they were not sold as [[animals]]—among the later [[tribes]] such a [[wife]] was not transferable. Neither was her purchase always just a cold-blooded [[money]] [[transaction]]; [[service]] was equivalent to cash in the purchase of a wife. If an otherwise desirable man could not pay for his wife, he could be [[adopted]] as a son by the girl's [[father]] and then could marry. And if a poor man sought a wife and could not meet the price demanded by a grasping [[father]], the [[elders]] would often bring [[pressure]] to bear upon the [[father]] which would result in a [[modification]] of his demands, or else there might be an [[elopement]].

83:3.3 As [[civilization]] progressed, [[fathers]] did not like to [[appear]] to sell their daughters, and so, while continuing to [[accept]] the bride purchase price, they [[initiated]] the [[custom]] of giving the pair valuable presents which about [[equaled]] the purchase [[money]]. And upon the later discontinuance of payment for the bride, these presents became the bride's [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry dowry].

83:3.3 As [[civilization]] progressed, [[fathers]] did not like to [[appear]] to sell their daughters, and so, while continuing to [[accept]] the bride purchase price, they [[initiated]] the [[custom]] of giving the pair valuable presents which about [[equaled]] the purchase [[money]]. And upon the later discontinuance of payment for the bride, these presents became the bride's [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry dowry].

83:3.4 The [[idea]] of a dowry was to convey the impression of the bride's [[independence]], to suggest far removal from the times of [[slave]] [[wives]] and [[property]] companions. A man could not [[divorce]] a dowered wife without paying back the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry dowry] in full. Among some [[tribes]] a [[mutual]] deposit was made with the [[parents]] of both bride and groom to be forfeited in case either deserted the other, in [[reality]] a marriage bond. During the period of [[transition]] from purchase to dowry, if the [[wife]] were purchased, the [[children]] belonged to the [[father]]; if not, they belonged to the [[wife]]'s [[family]].

83:3.4 The [[idea]] of a dowry was to convey the impression of the bride's [[independence]], to suggest far removal from the times of [[slave]] [[wives]] and [[property]] companions. A man could not [[divorce]] a dowered wife without paying back the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry dowry] in full. Among some [[tribes]] a [[mutual]] deposit was made with the [[parents]] of both bride and groom to be forfeited in case either deserted the other, in [[reality]] a marriage bond. During the period of [[transition]] from purchase to dowry, if the [[wife]] were purchased, the [[children]] belonged to the [[father]]; if not, they belonged to the [[wife]]'s [[family]].

==83:4. THE WEDDING CEREMONY==

==83:4. THE WEDDING CEREMONY==

83:4.2 [[Magic]], [[ritual]], and [[ceremony]] surrounded the entire life of the [[ancients]], and marriage was no exception. As [[civilization]] advanced, as marriage became more seriously regarded, the [[wedding]] [[ceremony]] became increasingly pretentious. Early marriage was a [[factor]] in [[property]] interests, even as it is today, and therefore required a [[legal]] [[ceremony]], while the [[social status]] of subsequent [[children]] demanded the widest possible [[publicity]]. [[Primitive]] man had no [[records]]; therefore must the marriage [[ceremony]] be [[witnessed]] by many [[persons]].

83:4.2 [[Magic]], [[ritual]], and [[ceremony]] surrounded the entire life of the [[ancients]], and marriage was no exception. As [[civilization]] advanced, as marriage became more seriously regarded, the [[wedding]] [[ceremony]] became increasingly pretentious. Early marriage was a [[factor]] in [[property]] interests, even as it is today, and therefore required a [[legal]] [[ceremony]], while the [[social status]] of subsequent [[children]] demanded the widest possible [[publicity]]. [[Primitive]] man had no [[records]]; therefore must the marriage [[ceremony]] be [[witnessed]] by many [[persons]].

83:4.3 At first the [[wedding]] [[ceremony]] was more on the order of a [[betrothal]] and consisted only in [[public]] notification of [[intention]] of living [[together]]; later it consisted in [[formal]] eating together. Among some [[tribes]] the parents simply took their daughter to the [[husband]]; in other cases the only [[ceremony]] was the [[formal]] exchange of presents, after which the bride's [[father]] would present her to the groom. Among many [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Levant Levantine] peoples it was the [[custom]] to dispense with all formality, marriage being consummated by [[sex]] relations. The red man was the first to [[develop]] the more elaborate [[celebration]] of weddings.

83:4.3 At first the [[wedding]] [[ceremony]] was more on the order of a [[betrothal]] and consisted only in [[public]] notification of [[intention]] of living [[together]]; later it consisted in [[formal]] eating together. Among some [[tribes]] the parents simply took their daughter to the [[husband]]; in other cases the only [[ceremony]] was the [[formal]] exchange of presents, after which the bride's [[father]] would present her to the groom. Among many [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Levant Levantine] peoples it was the [[custom]] to dispense with all formality, marriage being consummated by [[sex]] relations. The red man was the first to [[develop]] the more elaborate [[celebration]] of weddings.

83:4.4 Childlessness was greatly dreaded, and since barrenness was [[attributed]] to [[spirit]] [[machinations]], [[efforts]] to insure [[fecundity]] also led to the [[association]] of [[marriage]] with certain [[magical]] or [[religious]] [[ceremonials]]. And in this [[effort]] to insure a [[happy]] and [[fertile]] marriage, many [[charms]] were employed; even the [[astrologers]] were consulted to ascertain the [[birth]] stars of the contracting parties. At one time the [[human]] [[sacrifice]] was a regular feature of all [[weddings]] among [[Wealth|well-to-do]] people.

83:4.4 Childlessness was greatly dreaded, and since barrenness was [[attributed]] to [[spirit]] [[machinations]], [[efforts]] to insure [[fecundity]] also led to the [[association]] of [[marriage]] with certain [[magical]] or [[religious]] [[ceremonials]]. And in this [[effort]] to insure a [[happy]] and [[fertile]] marriage, many [[charms]] were employed; even the [[astrologers]] were consulted to ascertain the [[birth]] stars of the contracting parties. At one time the [[human]] [[sacrifice]] was a regular feature of all [[weddings]] among [[Wealth|well-to-do]] people.

83:4.5 Lucky days were sought out, Thursday being most favorably regarded, and weddings celebrated at the full of the [[moon]] were thought to be exceptionally fortunate. It was the [[custom]] of many [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Near_East Near Eastern] peoples to throw grain upon the newlyweds; this was a [[magical]] [[rite]] which was supposed to insure [[fecundity]]. Certain [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oriental Oriental] peoples used rice for this [[purpose]].

83:4.5 Lucky days were sought out, Thursday being most favorably regarded, and weddings celebrated at the full of the [[moon]] were thought to be exceptionally fortunate. It was the [[custom]] of many [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Near_East Near Eastern] peoples to throw grain upon the newlyweds; this was a [[magical]] [[rite]] which was supposed to insure [[fecundity]]. Certain [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oriental Oriental] peoples used rice for this [[purpose]].

83:4.6 [[Fire]] and [[water]] were always [[considered]] the best means of resisting [[ghosts]] and evil [[spirits]]; hence [[altar]] fires and lighted candles, as well as the baptismal sprinkling of [[holy]] [[water]], were usually in [[evidence]] at weddings. For a long time it was customary to set a false wedding day and then suddenly postpone the [[event]] so as to put the [[ghosts]] and spirits off the track.

83:4.6 [[Fire]] and [[water]] were always [[considered]] the best means of resisting [[ghosts]] and evil [[spirits]]; hence [[altar]] fires and lighted candles, as well as the baptismal sprinkling of [[holy]] [[water]], were usually in [[evidence]] at weddings. For a long time it was customary to set a false wedding day and then suddenly postpone the [[event]] so as to put the [[ghosts]] and spirits off the track.

83:4.7 The teasing of newlyweds and the pranks played upon [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honeymoon honeymooners] are all [[relics]] of those far-distant days when it was [[thought]] best to appear miserable and ill at ease in the sight of the spirits so as to avoid arousing their [[envy]]. The wearing of the bridal veil is a [[relic]] of the times when it was considered [[necessary]] to [[disguise]] the bride so that [[ghosts]] might not recognize her and also to hide her [[beauty]] from the gaze of the otherwise [[jealous]] and envious spirits. The bride's feet must never [[touch]] the ground just prior to the [[ceremony]]. Even in the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/20th_Century twentieth century] it is still the [[custom]] under the [[Christian]] [[mores]] to stretch carpets from the carriage landing to the [[church]] [[altar]].

83:4.7 The teasing of newlyweds and the pranks played upon [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honeymoon honeymooners] are all [[relics]] of those far-distant days when it was [[thought]] best to appear miserable and ill at ease in the sight of the spirits so as to avoid arousing their [[envy]]. The wearing of the bridal veil is a [[relic]] of the times when it was considered [[necessary]] to [[disguise]] the bride so that [[ghosts]] might not recognize her and also to hide her [[beauty]] from the gaze of the otherwise [[jealous]] and envious spirits. The bride's feet must never [[touch]] the ground just prior to the [[ceremony]]. Even in the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/20th_Century twentieth century] it is still the [[custom]] under the [[Christian]] [[mores]] to stretch carpets from the carriage landing to the [[church]] [[altar]].

83:4.8 One of the most [[ancient]] forms of the wedding [[ceremony]] was to have a [[priest]] [[bless]] the wedding bed to insure the [[fertility]] of the [[union]]; this was done long before any [[formal]] wedding [[ritual]] was [[established]]. During this period in the [[evolution]] of the marriage [[mores]] the wedding guests were expected to file through the bedchamber at night, thus constituting [[legal]] [[witness]] to the consummation of marriage.

83:4.8 One of the most [[ancient]] forms of the wedding [[ceremony]] was to have a [[priest]] [[bless]] the wedding bed to insure the [[fertility]] of the [[union]]; this was done long before any [[formal]] wedding [[ritual]] was [[established]]. During this period in the [[evolution]] of the marriage [[mores]] the wedding guests were expected to file through the bedchamber at night, thus constituting [[legal]] [[witness]] to the consummation of marriage.

83:5.1 In the early [[history]] of marriage the unmarried [[women]] belonged to the [[men]] of the [[tribe]]. Later on, a woman had only one [[husband]] at a time. This [[practice]] of one-man-at-a-time was the first step away from the [[promiscuity]] of the herd. While a woman was allowed but one man, her husband could sever such temporary [[relationships]] at will. But these loosely regulated [[associations]] were the first step toward living pairwise in distinction to living herdwise. In this [[stage]] of marriage [[development]] [[children]] usually belonged to the [[mother]].

83:5.1 In the early [[history]] of marriage the unmarried [[women]] belonged to the [[men]] of the [[tribe]]. Later on, a woman had only one [[husband]] at a time. This [[practice]] of one-man-at-a-time was the first step away from the [[promiscuity]] of the herd. While a woman was allowed but one man, her husband could sever such temporary [[relationships]] at will. But these loosely regulated [[associations]] were the first step toward living pairwise in distinction to living herdwise. In this [[stage]] of marriage [[development]] [[children]] usually belonged to the [[mother]].

83:5.2 The next step in [[mating]] [[evolution]] was the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Group_marriage group marriage]. This [[communal]] [[phase]] of marriage had to [[intervene]] in the unfolding of [[family]] life because the marriage [[mores]] were not yet strong enough to make pair associations permanent. The brother and sister marriages belonged to this group; five brothers of one family would marry five sisters of another. All over the world the looser forms of [[communal]] marriage gradually evolved into various [[types]] of group marriage. And these [[group]] [[associations]] were largely regulated by the [[totem]] [[mores]]. [[Family]] life slowly and surely [[developed]] because [[sex]] and marriage regulation [[favored]] the [[survival]] of the [[tribe]] itself by insuring the [[survival]] of larger numbers of [[children]].

83:5.2 The next step in [[mating]] [[evolution]] was the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Group_marriage group marriage]. This [[communal]] [[phase]] of marriage had to [[intervene]] in the unfolding of [[family]] life because the marriage [[mores]] were not yet strong enough to make pair associations permanent. The brother and sister marriages belonged to this group; five brothers of one family would marry five sisters of another. All over the world the looser forms of [[communal]] marriage gradually evolved into various [[types]] of group marriage. And these [[group]] [[associations]] were largely regulated by the [[totem]] [[mores]]. [[Family]] life slowly and surely [[developed]] because [[sex]] and marriage regulation [[favored]] the [[survival]] of the [[tribe]] itself by insuring the [[survival]] of larger numbers of [[children]].

83:5.3 [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Group_marriage Group marriages] [[gradually]] gave way before the emerging [[practices]] of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy polygamy]—[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny] and [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyandry polyandry]—among the more advanced [[tribes]]. But [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyandry polyandry] was never general, being usually [[limited]] to queens and [[Wealth|rich]] [[women]]; furthermore, it was customarily a [[family]] affair, one wife for several brothers. [[Caste]] and [[economic]] restrictions sometimes made it [[necessary]] for several men to content themselves with one [[wife]]. Even then, the woman would marry only one, the others being loosely tolerated as "uncles" of the joint [[progeny]].

83:5.3 [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Group_marriage Group marriages] [[gradually]] gave way before the emerging [[practices]] of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy polygamy]—[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny] and [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyandry polyandry]—among the more advanced [[tribes]]. But [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyandry polyandry] was never general, being usually [[limited]] to queens and [[Wealth|rich]] [[women]]; furthermore, it was customarily a [[family]] affair, one wife for several brothers. [[Caste]] and [[economic]] restrictions sometimes made it [[necessary]] for several men to content themselves with one [[wife]]. Even then, the woman would marry only one, the others being loosely tolerated as "uncles" of the joint [[progeny]].

83:5.4 The [[Jewish]] [[custom]] requiring that a man consort with his deceased [[brother]]'s [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Widow widow] for the [[purpose]] of "raising up seed for his brother,"[https://nordan.daynal.org/wiki/index.php?title=Gospel_of_matthew#Chapter_22] was the [[custom]] of more than half the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ancient_World ancient world]. This was a [[relic]] of the [[time]] when marriage was a [[family]] affair rather than an [[individual]] [[association]].

83:5.4 The [[Jewish]] [[custom]] requiring that a man consort with his deceased [[brother]]'s [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Widow widow] for the [[purpose]] of "raising up seed for his brother,"[https://nordan.daynal.org/wiki/index.php?title=Gospel_of_matthew#Chapter_22] was the [[custom]] of more than half the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ancient_World ancient world]. This was a [[relic]] of the [[time]] when marriage was a [[family]] affair rather than an [[individual]] [[association]].

83:5.5 The [[institution]] of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny] recognized, at various times, four sorts of wives:

83:5.5 The [[institution]] of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny] recognized, at various times, four sorts of wives:

*1. The [[ceremonial]] or [[legal]] wives.

*1. The [[ceremonial]] or [[legal]] wives.

*2. Wives of [[affection]] and permission.

*2. Wives of [[affection]] and permission.

*3. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubines Concubines], contractual wives.

*3. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubines Concubines], contractual wives.

*4. [[Slave]] wives.

*4. [[Slave]] wives.

83:5.6 True [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny], where all the wives are of [[equal]] [[status]] and all the [[children]] [[equal]], has been very rare. Usually, even with [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plural_marriage plural marriages], the [[home]] was dominated by the head wife, the [[status]] companion. She alone had the [[ritual]] [[wedding]] [[ceremony]], and only the [[children]] of such a purchased or dowered spouse could inherit unless by special arrangement with the [[status]] wife.

83:5.6 True [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny], where all the wives are of [[equal]] [[status]] and all the [[children]] [[equal]], has been very rare. Usually, even with [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plural_marriage plural marriages], the [[home]] was dominated by the head wife, the [[status]] companion. She alone had the [[ritual]] [[wedding]] [[ceremony]], and only the [[children]] of such a purchased or dowered spouse could inherit unless by special arrangement with the [[status]] wife.

83:5.7 The [[status]] [[wife]] was not necessarily the [[love]] wife; in early times she usually was not. The love wife, or sweetheart, did not appear until the races were considerably advanced, more particularly after the blending of the evolutionary [[tribes]] with the [[Nodites]] and [https://nordan.daynal.org/wiki/index.php?title=Paper_76#76:4._THE_VIOLET_RACE Adamites].

83:5.7 The [[status]] [[wife]] was not necessarily the [[love]] wife; in early times she usually was not. The love wife, or sweetheart, did not appear until the races were considerably advanced, more particularly after the blending of the evolutionary [[tribes]] with the [[Nodites]] and [https://nordan.daynal.org/wiki/index.php?title=Paper_76#76:4._THE_VIOLET_RACE Adamites].

83:5.8 The [[taboo]] wife—one wife of [[legal]] [[status]]—created the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubine concubine] [[mores]]. Under these mores a man might have only one wife, but he could maintain [[sex]] [[relations]] with any number of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubine concubines]. Concubinage was the steppingstone to [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy monogamy], the first move away from frank [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny]. The concubines of the [[Jews]], [[Romans]], and [[Chinese]] were very frequently the handmaidens of the [[wife]]. Later on, as among the [[Jews]], the [[legal]] [[wife]] was looked upon as the [[mother]] of all children born to the [[husband]].

83:5.8 The [[taboo]] wife—one wife of [[legal]] [[status]]—created the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubine concubine] [[mores]]. Under these mores a man might have only one wife, but he could maintain [[sex]] [[relations]] with any number of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubine concubines]. Concubinage was the steppingstone to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy monogamy], the first move away from frank [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny]. The concubines of the [[Jews]], [[Romans]], and [[Chinese]] were very frequently the handmaidens of the [[wife]]. Later on, as among the [[Jews]], the [[legal]] [[wife]] was looked upon as the [[mother]] of all children born to the [[husband]].

83:5.9 The olden [[taboos]] on [[sex]] [[relations]] with a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pregnant pregnant] or nursing wife tended greatly to foster [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny]. [[Primitive]] [[women]] aged very early because of frequent childbearing coupled with hard [[work]]. (Such overburdened wives only managed to exist by [[virtue]] of the [[fact]] that they were put in [[isolation]] one week out of each month when they were not heavy with child.) Such a [[wife]] often grew tired of bearing [[children]] and would request her husband to take a second and younger wife, one able to help with both childbearing and the [[domestic]] [[work]]. The new wives were therefore usually hailed with delight by the older spouses; there existed nothing on the order of [[sex]] [[jealousy]].

83:5.9 The olden [[taboos]] on [[sex]] [[relations]] with a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pregnant pregnant] or nursing wife tended greatly to foster [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny polygyny]. [[Primitive]] [[women]] aged very early because of frequent childbearing coupled with hard [[work]]. (Such overburdened wives only managed to exist by [[virtue]] of the [[fact]] that they were put in [[isolation]] one week out of each month when they were not heavy with child.) Such a [[wife]] often grew tired of bearing [[children]] and would request her husband to take a second and younger wife, one able to help with both childbearing and the [[domestic]] [[work]]. The new wives were therefore usually hailed with delight by the older spouses; there existed nothing on the order of [[sex]] [[jealousy]].

83:5.10 The number of wives was only [[limited]] by the [[ability]] of the man to [[provide]] for them. [[Wealthy]] and able men wanted large numbers of [[children]], and since the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infant_mortality infant mortality] was very high, it required an assembly of wives to recruit a large [[family]]. Many of these plural wives were mere laborers, [[slave]] wives.

83:5.10 The number of wives was only [[limited]] by the [[ability]] of the man to [[provide]] for them. [[Wealthy]] and able men wanted large numbers of [[children]], and since the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infant_mortality infant mortality] was very high, it required an assembly of wives to recruit a large [[family]]. Many of these plural wives were mere laborers, [[slave]] wives.

83:5.11 [[Human]] [[customs]] evolve, but very slowly. The [[purpose]] of a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harem harem] was to build up a strong and numerous body of blood [[kin]] for the [[support]] of the throne. A certain chief was once convinced that he should not have a harem, that he should be contented with one wife; so he promptly dismissed his harem. The dissatisfied wives went to their [[homes]], and their offended [[relatives]] swept down on the chief in [[Anger|wrath]] and did away with him then and there.

83:5.11 [[Human]] [[customs]] evolve, but very slowly. The [[purpose]] of a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harem harem] was to build up a strong and numerous body of blood [[kin]] for the [[support]] of the throne. A certain chief was once convinced that he should not have a harem, that he should be contented with one wife; so he promptly dismissed his harem. The dissatisfied wives went to their [[homes]], and their offended [[relatives]] swept down on the chief in [[Anger|wrath]] and did away with him then and there.

==83:6. TRUE MONOGAMY—PAIR MARRIAGE==  

==83:6. TRUE MONOGAMY—PAIR MARRIAGE==  

83:6.1 [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy Monogamy] is [[monopoly]]; it is [[good]] for those who [[attain]] this desirable [[state]], but it tends to [[work]] a [[biologic]] hardship on those who are not so fortunate. But quite regardless of the [[effect]] on the [[individual]], monogamy is decidedly best for the [[children]].

83:6.1 [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy Monogamy] is [[monopoly]]; it is [[good]] for those who [[attain]] this desirable [[state]], but it tends to [[work]] a [[biologic]] hardship on those who are not so fortunate. But quite regardless of the [[effect]] on the [[individual]], monogamy is decidedly best for the [[children]].

83:6.2 The earliest monogamy was due to [[force]] of circumstances, [[poverty]]. Monogamy is [[cultural]] and societal, [[artificial]] and unnatural, that is, unnatural to [[evolutionary]] [[man]]. It was wholly [[natural]] to the purer [[Nodites]] and [https://nordan.daynal.org/wiki/index.php?title=Paper_76#76:4._THE_VIOLET_RACE Adamites] and has been of great [[cultural]] [[value]] to all advanced races.

83:6.2 The earliest monogamy was due to [[force]] of circumstances, [[poverty]]. Monogamy is [[cultural]] and societal, [[artificial]] and unnatural, that is, unnatural to [[evolutionary]] [[man]]. It was wholly [[natural]] to the purer [[Nodites]] and [https://nordan.daynal.org/wiki/index.php?title=Paper_76#76:4._THE_VIOLET_RACE Adamites] and has been of great [[cultural]] [[value]] to all advanced races.

83:6.3 The [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chaldean Chaldean] [[tribes]] recognized the right of a [[wife]] to impose a premarital [[pledge]] upon her spouse not to take a second wife or [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubine concubine]; both the [[Greeks]] and the [[Romans]] favored monogamous marriage. [[Ancestor]] [[worship]] has always fostered [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy monogamy], as has the [[Christian]] [[error]] of regarding marriage as a [[sacrament]]. Even the elevation of the [[standard of living]] has consistently militated against [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy plural wives]. By the time of [[Michael]]'s [[advent]] on [[Urantia]] practically all of the civilized world had [[attained]] the level of [[theoretical]] monogamy. But this passive monogamy did not mean that [[mankind]] had become habituated to the [[practice]] of real pair marriage.

83:6.3 The [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chaldean Chaldean] [[tribes]] recognized the right of a [[wife]] to impose a premarital [[pledge]] upon her spouse not to take a second wife or [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concubine concubine]; both the [[Greeks]] and the [[Romans]] favored monogamous marriage. [[Ancestor]] [[worship]] has always fostered [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy monogamy], as has the [[Christian]] [[error]] of regarding marriage as a [[sacrament]]. Even the elevation of the [[standard of living]] has consistently militated against [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy plural wives]. By the time of [[Michael]]'s [[advent]] on [[Urantia]] practically all of the civilized world had [[attained]] the level of [[theoretical]] monogamy. But this passive monogamy did not mean that [[mankind]] had become habituated to the [[practice]] of real pair marriage.

83:6.4 While pursuing the monogamic goal of the [[ideal]] pair marriage, which is, after all, something of a [[monopolistic]] [[sex]] [[association]], [[society]] must not overlook the unenviable situation of those unfortunate men and women who fail to find a place in this new and improved [[social]] order, even when having done their best to [[co-operate]] with, and enter into, its requirements. Failure to gain [[mates]] in the [[social]] arena of [[competition]] may be due to insurmountable [[difficulties]] or multitudinous restrictions which the current [[mores]] have imposed. Truly, monogamy is [[ideal]] for those who are in, but it must inevitably [[work]] great hardship on those who are left out in the cold of [[solitary]] [[existence]].

83:6.4 While pursuing the monogamic goal of the [[ideal]] pair marriage, which is, after all, something of a [[monopolistic]] [[sex]] [[association]], [[society]] must not overlook the unenviable situation of those unfortunate men and women who fail to find a place in this new and improved [[social]] order, even when having done their best to [[co-operate]] with, and enter into, its requirements. Failure to gain [[mates]] in the [[social]] arena of [[competition]] may be due to insurmountable [[difficulties]] or multitudinous restrictions which the current [[mores]] have imposed. Truly, monogamy is [[ideal]] for those who are in, but it must inevitably [[work]] great hardship on those who are left out in the cold of [[solitary]] [[existence]].

83:6.5 Always have the [[Minority|unfortunate few]] had to [[suffer]] that the [[majority]] might advance under the [[developing]] [[mores]] of evolving [[civilization]]; but always should the [[favored]] [[majority]] look with [[kindness]] and [[consideration]] on their less fortunate fellows who must pay the price of failure to [[attain]] membership in the ranks of those [[ideal]] [[sex]] [[partnerships]] which afford the [[satisfaction]] of all [[biologic]] urges under the [[sanction]] of the highest [[mores]] of advancing [[social]] [[evolution]].

83:6.5 Always have the [[Minority|unfortunate few]] had to [[suffer]] that the [[majority]] might advance under the [[developing]] [[mores]] of evolving [[civilization]]; but always should the [[favored]] [[majority]] look with [[kindness]] and [[consideration]] on their less fortunate fellows who must pay the price of failure to [[attain]] membership in the ranks of those [[ideal]] [[sex]] [[partnerships]] which afford the [[satisfaction]] of all [[biologic]] urges under the [[sanction]] of the highest [[mores]] of advancing [[social]] [[evolution]].

83:6.6 [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy Monogamy] always has been, now is, and forever will be the [[idealistic]] goal of [[human]] [[sex]] [[evolution]]. This [[ideal]] of true pair marriage entails [[Sacrifice|self-denial]], and therefore does it so often fail just because one or both of the contracting parties are deficient in that [[acme]] of all [[human]] [[virtues]], rugged [[self]]-[[control]].

83:6.6 [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy Monogamy] always has been, now is, and forever will be the [[idealistic]] goal of [[human]] [[sex]] [[evolution]]. This [[ideal]] of true pair marriage entails [[Sacrifice|self-denial]], and therefore does it so often fail just because one or both of the contracting parties are deficient in that [[acme]] of all [[human]] [[virtues]], rugged [[self]]-[[control]].

83:6.7 [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy Monogamy] is the yardstick which [[measures]] the advance of [[social]] [[civilization]] as distinguished from purely [[biologic]] [[evolution]]. Monogamy is not necessarily [[biologic]] or [[natural]], but it is indispensable to the [[immediate]] [[maintenance]] and further [[development]] of [[social]] [[civilization]]. It [[contributes]] to a delicacy of sentiment, a refinement of [[moral]] [[character]], and a [[spiritual]] [[growth]] which are utterly impossible in [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy polygamy]. A woman never can become an [[ideal]] [[mother]] when she is all the while compelled to [[engage]] in [[rivalry]] for her [[husband]]'s [[affections]].

83:6.7 [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy Monogamy] is the yardstick which [[measures]] the advance of [[social]] [[civilization]] as distinguished from purely [[biologic]] [[evolution]]. Monogamy is not necessarily [[biologic]] or [[natural]], but it is indispensable to the [[immediate]] [[maintenance]] and further [[development]] of [[social]] [[civilization]]. It [[contributes]] to a delicacy of sentiment, a refinement of [[moral]] [[character]], and a [[spiritual]] [[growth]] which are utterly impossible in [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy polygamy]. A woman never can become an [[ideal]] [[mother]] when she is all the while compelled to [[engage]] in [[rivalry]] for her [[husband]]'s [[affections]].

83:6.8 Pair marriage [[favors]] and fosters that [[intimate]] [[understanding]] and [[effective]] [[co-operation]] which is best for [[parental]] [[happiness]], child welfare, and [[social]] [[efficiency]]. Marriage, which began in crude [[coercion]], is gradually [[evolving]] into a magnificent [[institution]] of [[self]]-[[culture]],[[self]]-[[control]], self-[[expression]], and self-[[perpetuation]].

83:6.8 Pair marriage [[favors]] and fosters that [[intimate]] [[understanding]] and [[effective]] [[co-operation]] which is best for [[parental]] [[happiness]], child welfare, and [[social]] [[efficiency]]. Marriage, which began in crude [[coercion]], is gradually [[evolving]] into a magnificent [[institution]] of [[self]]-[[culture]],[[self]]-[[control]], self-[[expression]], and self-[[perpetuation]].

83:7.2 Among [[primitive]] peoples only about one half the marriages proved satisfactory. The most frequent [[cause]] for separation was barrenness, which was always blamed on the [[wife]]; and childless wives were believed to become snakes in the [[spirit]] world. Under the more [[primitive]] [[mores]], [[divorce]] was had at the [[option]] of the man alone, and these [[standards]] have [[persisted]] to the twentieth century among some peoples.

83:7.2 Among [[primitive]] peoples only about one half the marriages proved satisfactory. The most frequent [[cause]] for separation was barrenness, which was always blamed on the [[wife]]; and childless wives were believed to become snakes in the [[spirit]] world. Under the more [[primitive]] [[mores]], [[divorce]] was had at the [[option]] of the man alone, and these [[standards]] have [[persisted]] to the twentieth century among some peoples.

83:7.3 As the [[mores]] evolved, certain [[tribes]] [[developed]] two forms of marriage: the ordinary, which permitted [[divorce]], and the [[priest]] marriage, which did not allow for separation. The [[inauguration]] of wife purchase and wife [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry dowry], by introducing a [[property]] penalty for marriage failure, did much to lessen separation. And, indeed, many [[modern]] [[unions]] are [[stabilized]] by this [[ancient]] [[property]] [[factor]].

83:7.3 As the [[mores]] evolved, certain [[tribes]] [[developed]] two forms of marriage: the ordinary, which permitted [[divorce]], and the [[priest]] marriage, which did not allow for separation. The [[inauguration]] of wife purchase and wife [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry dowry], by introducing a [[property]] penalty for marriage failure, did much to lessen separation. And, indeed, many [[modern]] [[unions]] are [[stabilized]] by this [[ancient]] [[property]] [[factor]].

83:7.4 The [[social]] [[pressure]] of [[community]] standing and [[property]] [[privileges]] has always been potent in the [[maintenance]] of the marriage [[taboos]] and [[mores]]. Down through the ages marriage has made steady [[progress]] and stands on advanced ground in the [[modern]] world, notwithstanding that it is threateningly assailed by widespread dissatisfaction among those peoples where [[individual]] [[choice]]—a new [[liberty]]—figures most largely. While these upheavals of [[adjustment]] appear among the more [[progressive]] races as a result of suddenly [[accelerated]] [[social]] [[evolution]], among the less advanced peoples marriage continues to thrive and slowly improve under the [[guidance]] of the older [[mores]].

83:7.4 The [[social]] [[pressure]] of [[community]] standing and [[property]] [[privileges]] has always been potent in the [[maintenance]] of the marriage [[taboos]] and [[mores]]. Down through the ages marriage has made steady [[progress]] and stands on advanced ground in the [[modern]] world, notwithstanding that it is threateningly assailed by widespread dissatisfaction among those peoples where [[individual]] [[choice]]—a new [[liberty]]—figures most largely. While these upheavals of [[adjustment]] appear among the more [[progressive]] races as a result of suddenly [[accelerated]] [[social]] [[evolution]], among the less advanced peoples marriage continues to thrive and slowly improve under the [[guidance]] of the older [[mores]].

83:7.5 The new and sudden substitution of the more [[ideal]] but extremely [[individualistic]] [[love]] [[motive]] in marriage for the older and long-[[established]] [[property]] motive, has unavoidably caused the marriage [[institution]] to become temporarily unstable. Man's marriage [[motives]] have always far [[transcended]] actual marriage [[morals]], and in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Occident Occidental] [[ideal]] of marriage has suddenly far outrun the [[self]]-[[centered]] and but partially [[controlled]] [[sex]] impulses of the races. The [[presence]] of large numbers of unmarried [[persons]] in any [[society]] indicates the temporary breakdown or the [[transition]] of the [[mores]].

83:7.5 The new and sudden substitution of the more [[ideal]] but extremely [[individualistic]] [[love]] [[motive]] in marriage for the older and long-[[established]] [[property]] motive, has unavoidably caused the marriage [[institution]] to become temporarily unstable. Man's marriage [[motives]] have always far [[transcended]] actual marriage [[morals]], and in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Occident Occidental] [[ideal]] of marriage has suddenly far outrun the [[self]]-[[centered]] and but partially [[controlled]] [[sex]] impulses of the races. The [[presence]] of large numbers of unmarried [[persons]] in any [[society]] indicates the temporary breakdown or the [[transition]] of the [[mores]].

83:7.6 The real test of marriage, all down through the ages, has been that [[continuous]] [[intimacy]] which is inescapable in all [[family]] life. Two pampered and spoiled [[youths]], [[educated]] to expect every indulgence and full [[gratification]] of [[vanity]] and [[ego]], can hardly [[hope]] to make a great success of marriage and [[home]] building—a life-long [[partnership]] of self-effacement, [[compromise]], [[devotion]], and unselfish [[dedication]] to child [[culture]].

83:7.6 The real test of marriage, all down through the ages, has been that [[continuous]] [[intimacy]] which is inescapable in all [[family]] life. Two pampered and spoiled [[youths]], [[educated]] to expect every indulgence and full [[gratification]] of [[vanity]] and [[ego]], can hardly [[hope]] to make a great success of marriage and [[home]] building—a life-long [[partnership]] of self-effacement, [[compromise]], [[devotion]], and unselfish [[dedication]] to child [[culture]].

83:7.7 The high [[degree]] of [[imagination]] and fantastic [[romance]] entering into [[courtship]] is largely [[responsible]] for the increasing [[divorce]] [[tendencies]] among [[modern]] [http://www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Occident Occidental] peoples, all of which is further complicated by [[woman]]'s greater [[personal]] [[freedom]] and increased [[economic]] [[liberty]]. Easy [[divorce]], when the result of lack of [[self]]-[[control]] or failure of [[normal]] [[personality]] [[adjustment]], only leads directly back to those crude societal [[stages]] from which man has emerged so recently and as the result of so much [[personal]] anguish and racial [[suffering]].

83:7.7 The high [[degree]] of [[imagination]] and fantastic [[romance]] entering into [[courtship]] is largely [[responsible]] for the increasing [[divorce]] [[tendencies]] among [[modern]] [https://www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Occident Occidental] peoples, all of which is further complicated by [[woman]]'s greater [[personal]] [[freedom]] and increased [[economic]] [[liberty]]. Easy [[divorce]], when the result of lack of [[self]]-[[control]] or failure of [[normal]] [[personality]] [[adjustment]], only leads directly back to those crude societal [[stages]] from which man has emerged so recently and as the result of so much [[personal]] anguish and racial [[suffering]].

83:7.8 But just so long as [[society]] fails to properly [[educate]] [[children]] and [[youths]], so long as the [[social]] order fails to provide adequate premarital [[training]], and so long as unwise and immature youthful [[idealism]] is to be the arbiter of the entrance upon marriage, just so long will [[divorce]] remain prevalent. And in so far as the [[social]] [[group]] falls short of providing marriage [[preparation]] for [[youths]], to that extent must divorce [[function]] as the social safety valve which prevents still worse situations during the ages of the rapid [[growth]] of the evolving [[mores]].

83:7.8 But just so long as [[society]] fails to properly [[educate]] [[children]] and [[youths]], so long as the [[social]] order fails to provide adequate premarital [[training]], and so long as unwise and immature youthful [[idealism]] is to be the arbiter of the entrance upon marriage, just so long will [[divorce]] remain prevalent. And in so far as the [[social]] [[group]] falls short of providing marriage [[preparation]] for [[youths]], to that extent must divorce [[function]] as the social safety valve which prevents still worse situations during the ages of the rapid [[growth]] of the evolving [[mores]].

83:8.8 The [[ideals]] of marriage have made great [[progress]] in recent times; among some peoples woman enjoys [[practically]] [[equal]] [[rights]] with her consort. In [[concept]], at least, the [[family]] is becoming a loyal [[partnership]] for rearing [[offspring]], accompanied by [[sexual]] [[fidelity]]. But even this newer version of marriage need not presume to swing so far to the extreme as to confer [[mutual]] [[monopoly]] of all [[personality]] and [[individuality]]. Marriage is not just an [[individualistic]] [[ideal]]; it is the evolving [[social]] [[partnership]] of a man and a woman, existing and functioning under the current [[mores]], restricted by the [[taboos]], and enforced by the [[laws]] and regulations of [[society]].

83:8.8 The [[ideals]] of marriage have made great [[progress]] in recent times; among some peoples woman enjoys [[practically]] [[equal]] [[rights]] with her consort. In [[concept]], at least, the [[family]] is becoming a loyal [[partnership]] for rearing [[offspring]], accompanied by [[sexual]] [[fidelity]]. But even this newer version of marriage need not presume to swing so far to the extreme as to confer [[mutual]] [[monopoly]] of all [[personality]] and [[individuality]]. Marriage is not just an [[individualistic]] [[ideal]]; it is the evolving [[social]] [[partnership]] of a man and a woman, existing and functioning under the current [[mores]], restricted by the [[taboos]], and enforced by the [[laws]] and regulations of [[society]].

83:8.9 [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/20th_Century Twentieth-century] marriages stand high in comparison with those of [[past]] ages, notwithstanding that the [[home]] [[institution]] is now undergoing a serious testing because of the [[problems]] so suddenly thrust upon the [[social]] [[organization]] by the precipitate augmentation of woman's [[liberties]], rights so long denied her in the tardy [[evolution]] of the [[mores]] of [[past]] [[generations]].

83:8.9 [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/20th_Century Twentieth-century] marriages stand high in comparison with those of [[past]] ages, notwithstanding that the [[home]] [[institution]] is now undergoing a serious testing because of the [[problems]] so suddenly thrust upon the [[social]] [[organization]] by the precipitate augmentation of woman's [[liberties]], rights so long denied her in the tardy [[evolution]] of the [[mores]] of [[past]] [[generations]].

83:8.10 Presented by the Chief of [[Seraphim]] stationed on [[Urantia]].

83:8.10 Presented by the Chief of [[Seraphim]] stationed on [[Urantia]].