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Bob: I really don't know. It, [[frustration]], seems to be such a part of the whole [[process]]. I assume it's part of living, and it is part of our [[experiences]].

Bob: I really don't know. It, [[frustration]], seems to be such a part of the whole [[process]]. I assume it's part of living, and it is part of our [[experiences]].

Tomas (Bill): Yes, frustration does seem to be prevalent in early stages of [[civilization]]. One of the best [[techniques]] that I am familiar with, that I have used personally, is what your [[social scientists]] now call [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_reframing reframing], meaning the event is reinterpreted in a larger [[perspective]] and framework. In the process of reinterpretation the [[tension]] between [[expectation]] and [[actuality]] is often greatly reduced. That which is perceived initially as [[failure]], as [[tragedy]] and unmitigated [[evil]] can become, upon reinterpretation, a challenge for [[growth]], an opportunity for [[forgiveness]], an experience in learning greater [[patience]], a [[chance]] to exercise greater [[love]], and thereby increase one's [[soul growth]]. What do you think of that concept?

Tomas (Bill): Yes, frustration does seem to be prevalent in early stages of [[civilization]]. One of the best [[techniques]] that I am familiar with, that I have used personally, is what your [[social scientists]] now call [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_reframing reframing], meaning the event is reinterpreted in a larger [[perspective]] and framework. In the process of reinterpretation the [[tension]] between [[expectation]] and [[actuality]] is often greatly reduced. That which is perceived initially as [[failure]], as [[tragedy]] and unmitigated [[evil]] can become, upon reinterpretation, a challenge for [[growth]], an opportunity for [[forgiveness]], an experience in learning greater [[patience]], a [[chance]] to exercise greater [[love]], and thereby increase one's [[soul growth]]. What do you think of that concept?

Bob: I like it. It sounds like it (frustration) is just part of living though, because isn't that what we see as we live day in and day out? So is this just a part of [[life]]? We are to be [[frustrated]] and learn how to deal with that as a part of our [[experiences]], and [[hopefully]] learn something, like [[patience]]—quickly! (Laughter.) I want patience quickly.

Bob: I like it. It sounds like it (frustration) is just part of living though, because isn't that what we see as we live day in and day out? So is this just a part of [[life]]? We are to be [[frustrated]] and learn how to deal with that as a part of our [[experiences]], and [[hopefully]] learn something, like [[patience]]—quickly! (Laughter.) I want patience quickly.

Virginia: Tomas, I had two [[thoughts]] as you were talking. As a teacher, [[expectation]] is incredibly important Certainly [[research]] has been done where teachers have been given an [[average]] class and told these were [[gifted]] children, and they performed like gifted children. Therefor I know how important expectation is. I know you must be realistic with anyone, with yourself or with your class. But I [[think]] that if we, as [[human being]]s, really believed in that other person making it, reaching a [[goal]], they could do it a lot faster and go a lot further, than if we say they are an inferior kid, or you should have seen her brothers, or blah, blah, that I hear so often in my profession. So [[expectation]] is incredibly important. (Comments.)

Virginia: Tomas, I had two [[thoughts]] as you were talking. As a teacher, [[expectation]] is incredibly important Certainly [[research]] has been done where teachers have been given an [[average]] class and told these were [[gifted]] children, and they performed like gifted children. Therefor I know how important expectation is. I know you must be realistic with anyone, with yourself or with your class. But I [[think]] that if we, as [[human being]]s, really believed in that other person making it, reaching a [[goal]], they could do it a lot faster and go a lot further, than if we say they are an inferior kid, or you should have seen her brothers, or blah, blah, that I hear so often in my profession. So [[expectation]] is incredibly important. (Comments.)

One of my most immature third graders lost a tooth today, and she is thrilled, because I had have told her for three years that when the teeth start falling out she's going to be a great [[reader]]. And she believes it, and I do too. ([[Laughter]].) It's so incredible. You should have seen her in the middle of the lesson, she was just thrilled and her face glowed and she expects something very positive to come, and that's going to happen. I truly believe it.          The other thing, (and then I will shut up and you can comment on what I have babbled about), when you said it takes [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_reframing reframing], the thing I immediately saw was the story in the [[Urantia Book]] about the very primitive man holding a club. ([[100:4|100:4.5]]) The frame become much larger and we see the wild animal and the [[family]] that he is protecting with that club in his hand. I think that many times that it is because my frame is no small that I cannot see the [[potential]], the very positive potential, of the people that I rub shoulders with each day.

One of my most immature third graders lost a tooth today, and she is thrilled, because I had have told her for three years that when the teeth start falling out she's going to be a great [[reader]]. And she believes it, and I do too. ([[Laughter]].) It's so incredible. You should have seen her in the middle of the lesson, she was just thrilled and her face glowed and she expects something very positive to come, and that's going to happen. I truly believe it.          The other thing, (and then I will shut up and you can comment on what I have babbled about), when you said it takes [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_reframing reframing], the thing I immediately saw was the story in the [[Urantia Book]] about the very primitive man holding a club. ([[100:4|100:4.5]]) The frame become much larger and we see the wild animal and the [[family]] that he is protecting with that club in his hand. I think that many times that it is because my frame is no small that I cannot see the [[potential]], the very positive potential, of the people that I rub shoulders with each day.

Tomas (Bill): Thank you, Virginia, for stressing a very important aspect of [[expectation]] in which all too often [[limits]] are placed upon people's abilities and possibilities of [[achievement]], which limit them so that when there is a different set of expectations, whether by deliberate [[experimental]] [[manipulation]], as in the research that you referred to, (Comments.) or in other means, then people do perform at a higher level than was originally expected. My cautions about limitations on expectations regarding others was not intended to restrict [[ability]] and achievement expectations. I was referring to the fact that people do make [[decisions]]; and that it is impossible to [[predict]] those decisions with a great deal of [[certainty]]. Therefor, there may be [[disappointments]] etc., as a result of the behavior of other people.

Tomas (Bill): Thank you, Virginia, for stressing a very important aspect of [[expectation]] in which all too often [[limits]] are placed upon people's abilities and possibilities of [[achievement]], which limit them so that when there is a different set of expectations, whether by deliberate [[experimental]] [[manipulation]], as in the research that you referred to, (Comments.) or in other means, then people do perform at a higher level than was originally expected. My cautions about limitations on expectations regarding others was not intended to restrict [[ability]] and achievement expectations. I was referring to the fact that people do make [[decisions]]; and that it is impossible to [[predict]] those decisions with a great deal of [[certainty]]. Therefor, there may be [[disappointments]] etc., as a result of the behavior of other people.