1987-09-24-Speaking to Fill Quiet Spaces, Barriers
Topic: Speaking to Fill Quiet Spaces, Barriers
Group: New Zealand TeaM
Ch. Opening Prayer.
Teacher: I am Abraham, I am your Teacher.
All Good evening Abraham
Teacher: Greetings. Then who shall begin?
"Last week you suggested we look at our barriers, and I don't mind coming out with one of mine, and it's fear of embarrassment, making myself look silly in situations, group discussions. I can't stand the silence at any meetings, I have got to say something even if it's only a joke, just to break the silence and get things going, I feel awkward doing it, but I'd rather do that than have the silence.
Teacher: So you are aware of an uncomfortable silence, you are not content with silence.
"No, I feel embarrassment for myself, and possibly others as well.
Teacher: So you feel the need to fill the void.
"I tend to do the same right here, like now.
Teacher: I am aware Tommas: . You see, your fear is not of embarrass, it is of THE SlLENCE, and it is taking responsibility for others, yes? The embarrassment arises from the inner understanding that you have not the need to fill the void. You are understanding these words
"Yes, I think so.
Sl I wrote down 3 hurdles, but the first 2 maybe wrapped up in the 3rd one. I more or less ended the meeting last week by saying I didn’t like to be scorned at, I don't mind making myself an idiot, of being the clown, if I start it, if I choose the position, but I don't like being thought of as a fool by some body else, if I haven’t put myself in that position on purpose, but that's not going deep enough, there's more to it than that, I think it touches on pride, I lack self confidence, I've often been offered higher positions in jobs I have worked at, and I've always turned it down, and in fact recently left a job because I felt I was being pushed into a position of authority that I didn’t want to do. I think that was a fear of failing, which comes back to pride. I didn’t want to take on a job that I would let myself down, or the staff down, or the boss down. So I left because of pride, rather than fail. But I've also got a big hurdle of guilt. Of leaving my parents, Who didn’t need me at the time, but I feel, as I'm the eldest in the family, they needed me later. I feel guilty about losing two children during pregnancy. I feel I've done something wrong. Perhaps I didn’t eat the right foods, or take care of my body, or. perhaps that comes back to pride. So I've got a lot of emotions all mixed in together, and I'm not sure if they are separate hurdles, or if they are all one.
Teacher: They are connected.
Again you take responsibility for others. You so not wish to take authority for self. You do not wish responsibility for others. This fights with your feelings of inner self understanding, that you could. As to your parents, and your children, these are not conscience acts of yours causing deliberate pain, death. Release these feelings, see them for their true worth. It is again, responsibility. Acknowledge, accept. You gave life, it was taken. You shall contemplate. I shall discuss this further when the others have spoken.
Sl Thank you Abraham.
M lI think I have a fear of seeing myself as I am. And the questions I ask myself were, am I honest with myself, am I afraid of my own judgement, am I hiding from the honest judgement because of my pride it’s covering up my fear. Am I afraid I cannot love or forgive myself, if I cannot accept my honest judgement? These conditions to me show immaturity of self, immaturity indicates I am a child, I have much to learn for myself. A child's birthright is to trust, and I cannot trust and enter the learning state until I let go of fear, once I let go of fear, I can love & forgive myself and when that burden has lifted, I am free to be myself.
Teacher: Yes. You have spoken words which would apply to each of human kind, but, these very words, are YOUR BARRIER you are understanding Cast these words aside. Understand in truth, you are as a child, as each every one in this appointment is. Do not judge yourself. Do not use words as your barrier. Contemplate my words as we shall discuss when the others have spoken.
Pt. My barrier is a bit different, the way that I've looked at it. I've looked at it from the point of view of not growing spiritually, and I feel the barrier is not being able to accept part of your teachings regarding souls who have passed from Earth to a higher plane. For many years I have been of the belief that family in particular and also close friends who have passed over, are aware of our day to day existence, and that they do draw close to us particularly in times of celebration and sadness. This belief is very firm with me and my family, and we are unable to accept that they are not here to share with us at these times. My daughter when traveling overseas felt the presence of her grandfather with her many times, and although I've read your words on this, I still can't see them in the context to which I believe, and I think this is stopping me from growing & exploring further.
Teacher: It is a concept which is your barrier. Acceptance brings understanding. Accept your belief, and your barrier shall be diminished. Contemplate these words, we shall discuss this when the others have spoken.
Md I've been thinking since last weeks' appointment many times on my own barriers, and find it very hard to bring one through, apart from the one that I feel there could be doubt. Doubt not in your teachings, but doubt in my ability to carry out some of your teachings. I find it very hard to love human people who create such bad things to other people in this life, that I can't really find it in myself to forgive them truly, and this is where I feel one of my barriers lies.
Teacher: Yes. I shall say this to you Mondaa, for you to contemplate. Your barrier is the finite mind you must find, and join the infinite mind which shall give you understanding. You may contemplate these words, we shall discuss when the others have spoken.
Fp Unfortunately I wasn’t at the last appointment so, in the last 2 days I've been trying to think of barriers, since reading the words from the last appointment, Mainly I came up with things about me, which are not necessarily barriers between me and Abraham, things about myself I don't like, like hate, that I get sometimes, and maybe I give the impression that I am supercilious. I've come to accept that my path seems to be frustration, and again like Selina I had problems about leaving my family in England but since I've given this to the group and got an answer from Abraham, to say that my Fathers' soul has journeyed on, I feel a lot better about that, because I've given & I've received, perhaps I might be supercilious saying this but perhaps I haven’t got as many barriers as some of the other people here, but perhaps that is one of my barriers.
Teacher: Yes, your barrier Filip is yourself.
Dm. I think a couple of my biggest barriers are trusting myself and other people, and self confidence because of things that have happened at school when I was very small, and also one I've just thought of is setting goals too high for myself and being afraid of failing them, letting myself and other people down who expect me to maybe able to do it.
Teacher: Yes. Your barriers are similar to Selina. Fear of failure, which if you have listened to each express thoughts of barriers, you should have noticed fear of failure, self confidence, guilt, doubt, yes. Fear, yes.
Tm. It's made me more aware of the problem, and I know to try to beat it, and I know some of the things I have already done in the past, before looking for the barrier I've been doing anyway, mainly to combat the shyness, which is another barrier which l think I am slowly overcoming.
Teacher: Yes. There is of course a manner in which I could assist you all, especially Korde, and those others who are uncomfortable with silence, and that is to request you speak in turn, Melda, Martinus, etc., etc., etc., instead of allowing your free will to decide when you shall speak, if indeed you speak. You are understanding. You shall take refreshment, you shall discuss your barrier, my suggestion, and I shall return.
- TEA BREAK
Teacher: Then what think you of my suggestion
Pt,If they have nothing to say, they can say pass, but it gives them an opportunity.
Fp Is it us that talk a lot are restricting those that...
Lately I've tried not to talk as much to give everybody else a chance.
Tm.We all learn from them anyway.
Teacher: You should perhaps consider reversing the order, to become, feeling, thoughtful, action, understanding. You have been using, thoughtful, feeling, action, understanding, yes. This may assist you in releasing your barrier.
Martinus, you wish to comment?
Mt.I could mention what I was told that I thought that my barrier was that I tried to force what I was thinking in finding the peace I tried to find the peace, I try to think out other things which Abraham told me I was trying to direct the traffic, and causing a blockage instead of letting the traffic flow then everything would come through in a natural way, but I do try to force things through sometimes instead of letting things come up, flow naturally, and it don't cause a blockage.
Teacher: Yes. Petta.
Pt Well I thought that you were probably telling me to come to terms with how I feel against what I feel you have taught us, but it doesn’t seem enough.. There's a belief that's shaken there, and it's got to be strong.
This is clear for you
"Therefore I haven’t the right to tell others that their loved ones are watching over them, but this is how I want to tell people my belief, and it has helped people when I have said it. And I feel perhaps I am telling them something wrong.
Teacher: I have said, it is your belief, accept it. Others shall accept or refuse according to their word. You are understanding? You see, it is undesireous for me to batter down your barrier. So it is for you to accept and it shall become understanding. You are of discomfort?
Teacher: Correct. You see, you all have come from your different directions, over many years learning it is not unusual for you to all have differing views, concepts, belief systems. It is not for me to knock your belief system aside. I give you added information to build or destroy your belief system at your will. Yes? The words I have given may build your belief system if you desire. My words may be unclear for your understanding at this time, space, there shall come a time, space, when you shall receive understanding.
Teacher: You may, Charlemont, you wish to comment.
Ch Not at this stage, thank you Abraham.
Teacher: Tommas: ?
"Well, I used to be very shy, and then I trained myself through work etc not to be shy. I have this feeling, as I said before, the last place I worked that I had more understanding or was more aware than the person I was working for and I'm still certain that was right.
Teacher: I give you this to assist. You are looking back.
In the looking back, your self is your barrier.
Keep your eyes firmly ahead.
"but my eyes will still try to do what I've done all the time, which is get as far advanced as I can in whatever I do.
Dm.I think I will have to think about it.
Teacher: That is all you need to contemplate.
"Yes, you told me two or three lessons ago to accept that I over indulge, acknowledge that I do that, and that was easy to accept the truth, the reality, facing up to that was quite easy, so I imagine the others will be just as easy when I have thought on them.
Teacher: You see, in the taking responsibility for others you forget the responsibility for self. When you have responsibility for self, you then have respect for self, and you show responsibility to others.
There is a difference, yes.
Teacher: It should, if you allow it.
"Dominica got very upset in the tea break, saying that she also felt guilty, she was sharing my guilt of losing the two children, because she felt that because she had been born first, it had somehow messed my body up, and the path then, was not clear for the other two that followed, and I tried to explain to her she mustn’t share that guilt, because I was already ill during her pregnancy and Dominica was born 7 weeks early and we nearly lost her. Is there anything more you can say to Dominica to save her worrying any further? I don't know whether I have said enough to ease her mind.
Teacher: One moment. Hear this Dominica. Have respect for the life you have. Be joyful for the life you have, no not regret for that which is not yours. You have heard? You have understood? You have calm? Yes.
Sl Perhaps we put on a show for you and hide our inner feelings.
Teacher: What is occurring is this. You are knowing each other, Learning of each other and of yourself. You are privileged each to each in the giving and receiving of knowledge of each to each. Have respect for this giving and receiving. It is yours and yours only. Does anyone wish to comment? How was it, was it comfortable or dis-comfortable
Ml Well I feel much lighter, part of the burden has sort of lifted.
And you have done this for your self.
Md.Well I feel the burden has gone of having to go through the experience.
Fp.I thought I was getting to know the path I was supposed to be going on some time ago, and I've drifted away from it, but tonight has brought me back, probably onto looking ahead, as I was some time ago, and not worrying about what's happening in the past.
Teacher: Yes, you have done this for yourself.
Fp.Well, with your help.
Kd.I feel comfortable.
Dm Yes. I feel better. I realise from the barriers I mentioned tonight, that I have a long way to go.
Teacher: Do not concern.
"I think I had a bit of a shock last week, at the end of the meeting, when every body had gone home, and I had said just before the end of the meeting that I thought my barrier was not being scorned at, and when every body had gone home, the word, pride, hit me. And I thought, Gosh, has it been pride all these years that's stopped relationships, or friendships, or.. I don't know, just looking back it seems to have been a hurdle for me since I was a child.
And so you see, you have discovered for your selves, YOUR SELF. It may appear strange and of a little discomfort to put your self, first, in your thoughts. but as I have said before times, love of self, is love of God, is love of others, yes. You have enjoyed the experience of speaking in turn.
Teacher: You wish to continue this?
Tm It seems to have worked out quite well tonight.
Fp.I think Belinda is unhappy not to be here tonight to be with us.
Teacher: There shall be opportunity.
Fp.Yes, but she was here last week.
Sl Yes, but you won't be here next week, so you will miss the continuation of this one.
Fp.Yes, part of our frustrations,
Teacher: I shall not.
Teacher: I believe I have spoken of this before times, Charlemont, Martinus
Ml. Do they understand what they say?
Dm. I don't know. It’s just that this lady I met, said she did not believe in it, and people at the service kept saying to her, ask & ye shall receive, which is what we hear, and she said, all of a sudden she started speaking in a strange language, I don't know if she understood it or not. But she was surprised, because she didn’t believe in it, she thought this is silly, but ended up doing it as well.
Teacher: Then there are more queries?
Sl Would it confuse Petta if I said I felt a little bit the same way as she did, only it's not a barrier with me.
Teacher: It is not for me to say.
Sl, Well. I don't really think very much about my parents anymore, but I used to think that if I was enjoying some good news that they were sharing it with me, and they were with me at sad times to give me strength and courage to get through it.. And I used to think that in the early days when they died. but I've found over the years, I don't think about them so much anymore. I don't know if that helps Petta or not. The fact that I did believe what she believes and it's not that I disbelieve anymore, it's just I don’t….
Fp. Is it more,.. My background was that I was given church education, but I never... I reached the stage where nothing could confirm it and the same with spiritualism. I was... I wondered if my Father was in spirit watching over me, but I had no confirmation, but since coming here, I’ve now accepted everything that I've been told, at these meetings because I wasn’t firmly committed to all the other stuff before hand like you are, So I've been able to... When my father died and I had problems I looked in the papers for spiritualist churches, out nothing confirmed what I'd been told, but now I accept that our soul just goes on.
When you have learned tolerance, you shall have acceptance, you shall have understanding, which should eradicate the hatred for others which is for self, and replace with love, which is light, which is truth, which is God.